Good teachers

In watching my pastor and my boss, I realised good teachers don't just teach what/how they have been taught, they teach what they think should be taught. *in awe*

The beautiful transformation of Christianity

I continue to be amazed at how much of a genius CS Lewis is to come up with something as beautiful as this: "And that is precisely what Christianity is about. This world is a great sculptor's shop. We are the statues and there is a rumour going round the shop that some of us are someday going to come to life."

From the teachers at my old school

I was never taught by these teachers, but what he wrote for his farewell interview is really nice. Quoting his friend, “if you leave this school with your four grade As and you don’t feel slightly fraudulent about yourself, there’s something wrong with you.”

When making decisions

And afraid that I'm not in God's will, ask:
"Where do I see myself joining God's redemptive work?
How will this decision affect my participation in God's work?
http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/practical-faith/what-if-i-miss-god%E2%80%99s-will

Humility

When you offer advice/opinion, people say, "yea yea, now you're Christian, only you know what is best."
When you make a poor choice, people say, "so what if you're Christian? You're no better than any of us."
True, just as we are, no man is any better/worse than any other. Turning to Jesus allows a teacher into our lives to guide us, a father to lean on, a chance to be forgiven and make right. Turning to Jesus doesn't mean we'll never make mistakes again - human as we are, we don't always remember to surrender all decisions to Him. But we are given multiple chances to fight the same temptation if need be, drawing strength from our God, until through Him we are victorious over these challenges, again and again. Every "wrong decision" is a lesson in diminishing myself and leaning on Him, surrendering to His will, until hopefully one day it may become second nature to us. None of us are there yet, but our Father in heaven loves us anyway, and will always be encouraging us. He will not give up on us, neither should we give up on ourselves.
So when we make a mistake and men judge, it's ok to say, I was wrong. Men are poor representation of who Jesus is. Don't judge Jesus or God based on men, find out about Him by reading His word and talking to Him in prayer.

What we do matters
Faith that doesn't change the way we think, the way we do things, our attitudes really isn't faith at all. But acting like Jesus, doing the things He does, teaching the things He teaches without faith recognizing him as God's son, without experiencing His love for each of us will cause us to go wayward. What we do becomes a chore, and no longer out of the joy of His love. At it's root, Christianity isn't about changing the kind of person you are, or what you do, or what you say. It isn't about making life easier. It isn't about building a life that the whole world envies. It is primarily about building a relationship with Jesus. Everything else is an extension of how that relationship shapes our hearts.

Surrender

Everybody surrenders to something or someone in life. If not to God, you'll surrender to popular opinion, to money, to resentment or fear, or to your own pride, lust, and ego.

7-year post doc

Because for sure I will need to come back to read this
http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/guest-blog/2013/07/21/the-awesomest-7-year-postdoc-or-how-i-learned-to-stop-worrying-and-love-the-tenure-track-faculty-life/

Snippets - The gospel is not a behavior control program

fr http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/god-our-generation/gospel-not-behavior-control-program

...we often put our energy into changing others’ behavior, rather than introducing them to this astounding grace. I know I am far more comfortable when people do what I believe they’re supposed to be doing. And although it’s a complicated formula, I suspect I’ve desired it with more passion and energy than I have desired that the same individuals truly encounter God’s great love for them as they are.

The love that is meant to mark us as Christians is meant to receive people in the generous and gracious way Jesus received people.

To receive an “other” as they are, without first mandating behavior changes, requires us to tolerate a bit of anxiety or discomfort. It demands that we release, or at least relax, our natural impulse to announce our opinions. To receive another as they are, and not as we wish them to be, is to agree with the apostle Paul’s conviction that it is God’s kindness that leads to repentance.

This is the guy who, ignoring the opinions of others, bee-lined toward those His culture had identified as sinful.

Before He ever suggested, “Go and sin no more,” Jesus first welcomed and received unrepentant sinners.

This Momentary Marriage

Marriage is patterned after Christ’s covenant relationship to his redeemed people, the church. And therefore, the highest meaning and the most ultimate purpose of marriage is to put the covenant relationship of Christ and his church on display.

Staying married, therefore, is not mainly about staying in love. It is about keeping covenant. “Till death do us part” or “As long as we both shall live” is a sacred covenant promise—the same kind Jesus made with his bride when he died for her.

http://cdn.desiringgod.org/pdf/books_bmm/bmm.pdf

Does family matter?

Warning: This is going to be long.
In a world of broken families and self-fulfillment, why should we fight for the institution of family?
It probably wasn’t long ago when you heard someone say, family is where we find the richest of joys and the heaviest of burdens. Perhaps you recall a fleeting thought such as, my family members are so annoying, I can’t wait to pick my own family members, and everything will be perfect. Try as we may we can never escape the imperfections of family, and some struggle to find that “richest of joys” others claim to experience with their family.

Let me be slightly distracted. I was watching Now Is Good on the flight home, about a teenage girl who is suffering from leukemia, is into her 4th year with the condition, and who hasn’t got much time left. A rebellious teenage girl who doesn’t have much of life left has the perfect excuse to run off and experience life as she would like to define it – and she does, by coming up with a list of things she wanted to do before she dies. Here’s a snapshot of what made it to The List: Having sex, taking drugs, breaking the law. No she isn’t a wild one, if anything she has the most mellow disposition despite her wild desires. I recall a scene where she turns around and says to her parents how she is tired of her father’s desperate attempts to control and her mother’s absence, where she states matter-of-factly: “you are both wasting my time” and walks away alone. Her runaways alone stresses her father out, and there came a point where her father sits in the middle of her trashed bedroom, sees The List, and said crying, “I could have helped you with your List, I don’t want you to go”. Indeed, for the father, her dedicated care giver, he can’t let her go when he has invested so much time and energy into her. Maybe with the list she was seeking thrill, but when she later walks into the life of the neighbour boy, she finds that she was really looking for acceptance, encouragement, an unimposing caring presence, one who probes her reasons for the things she does, one who asks, what would you like me to do? And she tries to be just that to her little brother, when she brings her brother out saying “It’s your day, we will do whatever you want”, and brings her brother to indoor sky-diving when he said he wants to fly. She eventually finds her thrills of life, unexpected as they come, with her own try at indoor sky-diving, running into frigid waters of the English beaches, seeing the white cliffs of the Dorset coast, sitting high up in a tree in the middle of quiet woods: all times shared with people she loves. In one simple moving scene, she watches her brother play in the garden, as she thinks about who and what she is leaving behind. Maybe I could use all that as an example.

The Heaviest of burdens
There are those who, based on what they see/hear through various mediums, understand that you are supposed to help your family, it is your duty, your responsibility, which maybe you would not have picked up (that much of?) if given a choice (instruction). There are those who love their family enough to want to do anything, even denying themselves, to help the ones they love, whether or not they feel that particular family member has been instrumental in their life or not (conviction). It is not difficult to see which scenario causes one to find the family burdensome and leads to burn out. Maybe it could be affected by how others view what you do – “It is Dad’s duty to do this for me” vs “Thanks Dad for finding time to do this for me”. But regardless of how others view what you do, I think ultimately it’s about how you rank yourself with respect to your family in the importance scale. One could be in a place where you feel what you are doing is most important, like the absent mother who couldn’t make it to the hospital in time for her daughter’s chemo procedure. Or one could be in a place where you give and give so willingly and lovingly, like the father who always wants to be there. But we still see him breaking apart, which leads the next issue.

Getting sucked in
The more we give, the more we expect from those we give to. The father was trying so hard to keep his girl in as good health as is possible, yet he sees her destroying his hard work when she stays out late, goes drinking, dunks herself in cold seawater. One can only imagine her father’s disappointment and heartbreak. Yet we cannot control the decisions that another takes, we can try to advise them in an attempt to sway their judgement, but the decision eventually lies in their own hands. It is hardest to try to help someone yet not see cooperation from the ones we are helping. And depending on the situation there are times when it may be better to stop helping, there are times when it may be better to keep helping. With respect to convincing people, there is a “tactic” or “skill” of talking to another, where you try to lead him/her to (your) conclusion, but have them think they came to that conclusion themselves. Sometimes that works sometimes that doesn’t. So regardless of your tactic, one should always leave room for the other to make their own decisions – there is only so much you could help, you cannot make their decisions for them. Bracing yourself to let go could reduce disappointments when it doesn’t turn out as you would like, or lead to pleasant surprises if it does.
One may say her neighbour boy didn’t put in as much as her dad did to reach a stage where he could be disappointed. There may have been a moment, where she thought he was leaving her for college, and seeing how upset she was disappointed him. It was a different situation though, for to him, she was the one who helped him out of his hermit state and gave him the courage to go to college again after the death of his father. Yet to her, he was the one who helped her discover what she was yearning so badly for, and news of his leaving disappointed her. It was a misunderstanding. So perhaps they did put enough into each other for both of them to be disappointed. Disappointment is inevitable, but perhaps what is more important is managing how badly it affects you.

What about the self?
I remember a time when I said to myself, “If I focus on myself, rely on myself, and don’t bother about others, I won’t be disappointed.” And a voice replied, “Really?” And I recalled the times I messed up, I gave up, and I knowingly walked into shit because my will was weak in that moment. I remember being in a place where I had so much focus on myself that other people’s encouragement did not affect me at all – “what would YOU know about what I’M going through?” I did not care about others enough to be able to understand what others feel when they spoke to me like they cared about me. Put in another way, I did not care for others in the true sense of the word, so I thought others care about me in the same untrue way. In the movie, she had no cares in the beginning. With her good friend they went about leading the thrilling life – meeting random guys, kissing, trying to have sex, stealing someone’s credit card, leaving without paying. When she found out her good friend got pregnant, she cared enough to go to the clinic with her, and when her friend decided to keep the baby, she cared enough to want to be around when the baby’s due. And from then on, she was less hostile to her father’s care, perhaps because she was at a point where she just didn’t have that much energy, or perhaps because she was able to receive other’s care. Until you learn to give, you may never learn to receive.

Where is the “richest of joys”?
Short answer: In all the little things. It is amazing that the most moving scene was one as simple as watching her brother play in the garden. It was great that the scenes with family sitting by the bedside watching her as she drifts off were quick shots, with a nurse narrating what will be happening, as opposed to tired long drawn-out dramatic sobbing scenes (where I would struggle to cry because I keep reminding myself I should be crying). Spend time together, not just anytime, but quality time. Celebrating little achievements but magnifying them. Celebrating effort so they are never undermined. Birthdays that are not about eating cake but about the hurdles one overcame over the past year. Meals of thankfulness celebrating how one has been a blessing to loved ones. And especially, if one is lucky enough to be in a situation where everyone’s been working together towards one goal, perhaps helping someone reach their dreams, perhaps putting something together like a surprise party, and seeing it all come to fruition.

The importance of family.
True, we don’t get to pick our family. But that’s why family is training ground (for the future family). There is no such thing as perfection – we can only tend towards it. It is not about starting perfect. It is the walk that people take together through time. If it was all about choice, there will come a point when things fall apart and it is so bad that people say, “I don’t choose you anymore, I will choose another”. But it is not about choosing another, but choosing to learn to love one another, to fit one another, to serve one another. Whosoever might be naïve enough to think that 2 years or 5 years with one person, when we are all in our youthful prime, is enough to judge how this person will be like 20 or 50 years from now? People change with years, and we may never know our family members completely. But that should not keep us from loving the imperfect people that we all are.

Excerpts on marriage fr TGC

Specifically, Christian marriage reflects God as husbands love their wives "as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word" (Eph. 5:25).
Marriage based on needs and affection will struggle to endure when the needs change and the affection fades.
Any two people can partner together for support in childcare, housecleaning, finances, and sex. But it takes a true marriage to turn two into one all-giving whole. http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/tgc/2013/05/30/the-new-purpose-of-marriage/

Somehow, going over banquet videos helps cheer up a long day. so thankful for sonrise.

What makes this quarter harder to bear..

Not being able to attend seminars and journal clubs
Not being able to support my friends in their journal club presentations
Not going to the gym enough
Less time for lunches with friends
Waking up earlier to board a dizzying bus
Missing CG and possibly Sonrise
Not understanding class and wondering why I'm sitting in class
Will things be different once I've picked up expertise from the 20 different people I'm working with?...

Fathers and Daughters

In case I need to come back to this again
http://ldsliving.com/story/68982-5-ways-fathers-influence-their-daughters

big sister lessons.

You cannot fix someone else's life, you cannot tell someone else how to fix their life. you can only be available for support, and encourage them to figure it out. They've got to figure it out themselves.

prayer

Nothing is so big that God doesnt have authority over
Nothing is so small that doesnt deserve God's attention

It matters whom you marry

Because I keep coming back to this article and forgetting where to find it.
http://thechristianpundit.org/2012/08/15/it/
on Marriage

Praise night

I was looking forward so much to playing the piano that I didn't get anything done today. Stared at my finals papers for a long time, scribbled some, attended lecture and nodded off (don't even know why, too much sugar in my blood maybe). But still, despite a pretty much wasted day, a night of worship never fails to lift the spirit! First time playing the piano and leading the singing in small group. Thank you God for such an opportunity!

thoughts in Tahoe

家家有本难念的经
So really we are not so alone. it doesn't matter that people are not in the exact same situation. it doesn't matter that no one else can walk through this path for you. what matters is that there are people walking this path with you.
like how Sam says, "Mr Frodo, I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you"

and also where you place your hope. such that no matter how things turn out, we can have peace.

The riches of work

I can't believe this article (Finding the true riches in work) got published in ST, it's so counter-cultural, but so true. How chasing after status and money isn't going to bring you much happiness on its own. It's not like it's new to me, actually lately I find myself wondering a lot about whether what I'm going after is going to bring benefit to others. There was a point in time when I decided you can't go into research thinking I will cure this/that or I will come up with this/that vaccine. It's almost by luck that you are at the right place with the right people at the right time - any good scientist in the field could have come up the same idea but might not have the right resource or expertise. And often the question asked is quite far removed from the actual therapy that I'll think, this is not a helpful question to ask.
Most of the people I meet who are really happy in science are people who just love figuring out stuff, if it is helpful for therapy then that's a bonus. But then again, perhaps the scientists who really love what they do, are those who enjoy the endless question asking and experimenting while at the same time remain hopeful and convinced that their work is useful in the medical realm.

'tis the season

where everyone clears out their houses
and dumped christmas trees line the sidewalks

A familiar refrain

God on High, Hear my prayer
In my need, You have always been there
You can take, You can give
Bring him home

in the christmas mood

Nobel prize immuno website!

Must come here again when I'm doing another class for high school kids http://www.nobelprize.org/educational/medicine/immunity//immune-detail.html

fake accents

I'm a little happy that people will say I don't have an accent, and a little sad to have lost the ability to use a fake british accent.

mid terms

Something spooky about watching vampire movies and thinking about how dying cells can Become cancerous..

Couldn't have done it without divine inspiration. Praise the all knowing Lord!

when someone says
you can say whatever you want about me, but I know who I am
and wasn't trying to say that he's better

the perfect night

Walking barefoot on the beach. with soft soft sand seeping between my toes. using skyview app to identify constellations. random fireworks. awesome company. Moon shining on my bed as i sleep.

Transitions

Feels like I had an extended transition period. So great to have Mum around, something about 2 blur people that makes one feel less lonely. and great seniors who showed me all the ropes and provided me a cozy corner to rest for almost 2 weeks. Looking for a place to stay, navigating a strange city, and then looking for furniture and trying to time them all nicely to be picked up on the same day was a long-ish and arduous task. Luckily I didn't need to go it alone. Praise God for the people He placed in my life, the room and the furnitures He prepared for me, and the learning along the way. Now I'm ready to explore.

yann tiersen!

omg i'm so delighted that i've recovered some of yann tiersen's gems!

A Dog

in case i lose it.

Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa , and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker 's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.

Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ''I know why.''

Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live.

He said,''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?'' The Six-year-old continued,

''Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.''

Live simply.

Love generously.

Care deeply.

Speak kindly.

Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:

When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.

Take naps.

Stretch before rising.

Run, romp, and play daily.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you're not.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

There comes a time in life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good. So, love the people who treat you right. Think good thoughts for the ones who don't. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is part of LIFE...Getting back up is LIVING...

Have a great life.

by: Ultima National Resources, LLC Ultima National Resources, LLC

echoes my thoughts. and more
http://thechristianpundit.org/2012/08/15/it/

a youtube comment.

A Pastor once said to our congregation "If you are at your end, and you feel that you cannot go on any longer, then God must have incredible plans for your life if the enemy is trying so hard to talk you out of it." Remember that God has plans to prosper you, to give you hope and a future. It is the enemy that has plans to harm you. (Jeremiah 29:11)

on Kari Jobe's Here.

In Christ Alone

In Christ alone, my hope is found

He is my light, my strength, my song

This cornerstone, this solid ground

Firm through the fiercest drought and storm

What heights of love, what depths of peace

When fears are stilled, when strivings cease

My comforter, my all-in-all

Here in the love of Christ I stand

There in the ground His body lay

Light of the world by darkness slain

Then bursting forth in glorious day

Up from the grave He rose again
And as He stands in victory

Sin's curse has lost its grip on me 

For I am His and He is mine

Bought with the precious blood of Christ

No guilt in life, no fear in death 

This is the power of Christ in me

From life's first cry to final breath

Jesus commands my destiny

No power of hell, no scheme of man

Can ever pluck me from His hand

Till He returns or calls me home

Here in the power of Christ I'll stand
Till He returns or calls me home

Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

garageband try1

first time i put something together in garageband! i can't believe i took so long for such a simple song! Never grow up cover by emilytxz

let faith arise

God has been so generous today

9 “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10 Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11 If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! Matthew 7:9-11

not for duty's sake

We are not meant to be seen as God’s perfect, bright-shining examples, but to be seen as the everyday essence of ordinary life exhibiting the miracle of His grace.

If I will do my duty, not for duty’s sake but because I believe God is engineering my circumstances, then at the very point of my obedience all of the magnificent grace of God is mine through the glorious atonement by the Cross of Christ.

-from utmost.

i need to crash and BURN right now. somebody save me.

You are alpha and omega

We can only depend on those who love us, those whose love is unchangeable, whose character is immutable. One who is always and will always be there. There is only one person that we can depend wholly on.

God at work

As I listened to my senior pastor recount how he came to the vision and the values of the church, how it was undeniably God at work, I wondered whether my capability could become a hindrance for me when I fail to see how God was actually at work in every challenge that I've faced..

last kiss

absolutely love the harmony!

the purpose of this life

how often at various stages of my life have I pondered about this question..

when I see generation after generation of people brought to this earth, grow up as children, hope to find love, get married, have children, get a job, grow old, sometimes going through the motions as though it were a chore, especially when providence is uncertain, worrying about tomorrow. makes me ask, what is the point? so that one generation can learn to be more successful than the previous generation - as would be predicted by evolution based on adaptation to survive? adaptation to survive works when there is relative stability in environment, but not so much in environmental catastrophes, where survival does not depend on physical traits but by what people might call luck.

it is only in times of stability when we can "teach ourselves strategies that will allow us to become prosperous". but the world is not so stable is it? whether it is environmental disasters or unpredictable markets. when there is uncertainty, so-called "strategies" can fail. (so how can we rely on them?)

we are told from young - we must study hard, get many As, get into the best programmes, get all the relevant experiences, get many qualifications (the higher the better), and qualifications lead to better paying jobs, and then we don't need to worry about feeding ourselves (and our kids), getting a house. this message is ingrained when parents sign kids up for special tuition to take special exams. this message is ingrained when students take part in various activities (CCA, CIP, attachments...) to boost CV. this message is ingrained when students stay in school after the first degree to get a masters thinking it might give them an extra edge (which might not be true in every area of study).

when I see people using ways and means (lawful or not) to get around the system to climb the social or corporate ladder, I see it as a result of people's goal of being more successful than another, being more prosperous than another, maybe so that no one may look down on them, maybe so that one day they have something they can boast about.

and even when people become prosperous - are they satisfied?

could it be to fulfill childhood dreams? for some people fulfilling their dreams means getting the dream car dream house dream clothes/shoes. for some people fulfilling their dreams means doing something that helps them express themselves. for some people fulfilling their dreams means going to this place and that, to see the world, to meet lots of people. a lot of these dreams are self-centred dreams. but not everyone gets to fulfill their dreams, perhaps due to circumstance. so it cannot be that we live so as to fulfill our dreams, some lucky ones do. but that is not the end goal of living this life.

but everyone has a chance to find happiness, whatever their circumstance and situation.

i think, the purpose of this life is to learn to love. not just to be loved.
it is not so difficult to be loved - one can do things to try to attract people's adoration.
In learning to love, we learn
To treat any and everyone with care and respect
To give people the benefit of doubt
To be filled with compassion but not hatred
=> To be able to forgive
To be humble to learn from everyone
While not compromising on what is right and what is wrong

Such love may be viewed by people as foolish, as placing yourself in a situation where others could take advantage of you, or a situation where you receive no thanks for what you do. Certainly, loving others opens us to to disappointments or despair. But it is not about what you get in return for what you do. Your actions reinforce your principles. It's about what kind of character you build when you do certain things. It's between you and God and nobody else. And in difficult times, learning to love as we remind ourselves of God's love for us helps us-
To see any little blessing and find joy in it
To see God's providence and protective hand - and therefore be able to trust in it

That's all we really need to learn in this world - that we are loved by God and we should share this great love with the world.

unappreciated

when helping someone and making life easier for someone else attracts no notice, no thanks, no assistance, possibly even rejection, when you feel taken for granted. God sees it. Continue because God notices. As His people and carriers of His name, let no one else's opinion matter above Jesus's.

consider my loss

http://theamericanscholar.org/the-disadvantages-of-an-elite-education/

Because students from elite schools expect success, and expect it now. They have, by definition, never experienced anything else, and their sense of self has been built around their ability to succeed.

Now that students are in constant electronic contact, they never have trouble finding each other. But it’s not as if their compulsive sociability is enabling them to develop deep friendships. “To whom can I expose the urgency of my own passion?”

Reminder

We will be scattered, not into service but into the emptiness of our lives where we will see ruin and barrenness, to know what internal death to God’s blessings means.
Until Jesus Christ is truly our Lord, we each have goals of our own which we serve. Our faith is real, but it is not yet permanent. And God is never in a hurry. If we are willing to wait, we will see God pointing out that we have been interested only in His blessings, instead of in God Himself.

From Apr 04, Oswald Chamber's Daily Devotional

this is why guys must always make the first move

Gentlemen, you've got to have the GUTS to communicate your intentions. Ladies, if you are attracted to a guy who appears to share your interest but doesn't have the courage to communicate his feelings toward you, drop him like a bad habit. Men need to have enough sense and DISCERNMENT to recognise and acknowledge that spending time together creates some level of emotional commitment. Such a realisation should motivate a man to bring DEFINITION to the relationship. Guys, you are not ready for a relationship if you are content to continue flirting without sharing feelings. Feelings and intentions need to be communicated in the proper timing.

From Dating Delilah by Judah Smith

perks of living overseas

now i miss taking baths. instead of the usual shower

for my own reference.. PhD advice

http://www.nature.com/scitable/blog/labcoat-life/15_mistakes_young_researchers_make

http://matt.might.net/articles/ways-to-fail-a-phd/

one at a time?

there's so many things I want to pray about, I hope I don't miss any out (though I'm sure I do), my heart can't even dedicate enough time to each of the things I'm concerned about. sometimes I wonder if things are going so slow because I don't spend enough time and heart praying about it.

How rich are we?

A Christian's Possessions
A tax officer came one day to a poor Christian to determine the amount of taxes he would have to pay.

"What property do you possess?" asked the assessor.

"I am a very wealthy man," replied the Christian.

"List your possessions, please," the assessor instructed.

The Christian said:
"First, I have everlasting life. (John 3:16)
Second, I have a mansion in Heaven. (John 14:2)
Third, I have a perfect conscience & peace that passes all understanding. (Philippians 4:7)
Fourth, I have joy unspeakable. (1 Peter 1:8)
Fifth, I have divine love which never fails. (1 Corinthians 13:8)
Sixth, I have a faithful wife. (Proverbs 31:10)
Seventh, I have healthy, happy obedient children. (Exodus 20:12)
Eighth, I have true, loyal friends. (Proverbs 18:24)
Ninth, I have songs in the night. (Psalms 42:8)
Tenth, I have a crown of life. (James 1:12)"

The tax assessor closed his book, and said, "Truly you are a very rich man, but your property is not subject to taxation."

the power of LATER

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/changepower/201110/the-tricks-treats

Lord of Heaven and Earth

oh Father stay close, don't let me stray

freezing cold places

so my dad stopped me from applying to wisconsin thinking i'll freeze myself there. now i'm applying to a small ulu place where the nearest town is Minneapolis. O_O lets hope theres lots of snowy sunny days up there!

so cool

Did you know that the word "POSH" comes from maritime language?! The best cabins on Indiaman, a sailing ship that travelled between Britain and India, were the cooler cabins on the North side of the ship. Ones labeled as "Port side going Out, Starboard going Home"... or simply - POSH cabins

Happiness is a personal choice. It does not need to depend on the things that happen around/to us.

Now i just need to believe that.

http://theweek.com/article/index/99512/the-last-word-he-said-he-was-leaving-she-ignored-him

much needed..

glory to God, Monday is a public holiday!

Just a visitor

so he visited, we had a good dinner, drove us home, then he drove off. being together is only temporary. can we only have goodness for a short while...

There's a raging sea, right in front of me, wants to pull me in, bring me to my feet

So let the waters rise, if You want them to, I will follow you, I will follow you

1 Peter 1:4-7

In his great mercy he has given us a new birth into a living hope, ... and into an inheritance..., kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honour when Jesus Christ is revealed.

the power of our hearts

http://consciouslifenews.com/the-rescuing-hug-and-power-of-emotions/113772/
such joyful girls they've grown up to be: http://4nielsens.blogspot.com/

My opposition party is spending too much time refuting untrue claims. This time could be better spent on useful stuff instead of defending themselves against baseless attacks!

http://wp.sg/2011/08/media-release-on-untrue-claims-of-curtailment-of-pap-grassroots-activities-in%E2%80%A8-hougang-smc/?awesm=fbshare.me_AdRqE&utm_campaign=&utm_medium=fbshare.me-facebook-post&utm_source=facebook.com&utm_content=fbshare-js-large

i hope you're doing well.

http://thoughtcatalog.com/2011/a-love-letter-to-a-friend/

oh no... I missed it.. =(

Forgiveness is one thing. reconciliation is another.

http://thinkpoint.wordpress.com/2011/07/16/a-closer-look-at-forgiveness/

forgiveness doesnt depend on the offender, reconciliation does. carefully observe changes in attitudes and behaviour before reconciliation.

because life is too difficult

dumb little man and their useful tips for life

http://www.dumblittleman.com/2011/06/powerful-ideas-that-will-bring-greater.html

Women. we can turn the world around. by being women, not by taking on characteristics of men.

blessed beyond belief

for a wonderful lab, amazing supervisors

for insightful discussions, great companions and great friendship

for perfect timing

for the lessons in life

today's message says...

that strong family makes a healthy foundation for life's adventures.
Family to support you in times of need, to challenge you to grow, to celebrate with you in times of victory. sweet.

so I'll stand

with arms high and heart abandoned

graduate school applications

i havent even started and i'm already headaching.

i feel like i know enough things in enough depth that i dunno what to do my phd in (cos i dun wanna study all the immunology again or all the individual infections again)

but i don't feel like i know how to be a scientist yet, ask questions, design experiments, make sure i have all my controls, think about all the confounding factors..

vaccine trials?

more infection immunology?

...structural biology?

what about pharmacology..

bookmarked for reading

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/201104/6-clues-character

Attributes in people that are generally accurate in the long term

my facebook status

i wasn't expecting great popularity, likes and comments on my status.

it reads: after 2 days of scrubbing my toilet is SHINY =D

so many people came to 'like' it, i think people who like it, like it for at least 1 of 3 reasons:

1- they like my standard of cleanliness, ie shiny

2- they like that i care about the cleanliness of the toilet

or 3- they like that i was honest about the previous state of my toilet (it really wasn't that bad, if it was bad enough i would have been unable to sleep, my housemates can testify to me sleeping late because i was cleaning the loo)

i didn't think i needed a particularly good reason for cleaning up the house before i have guests. mum or friends, i always thoroughly clean up the house before my guests come: my room, the kitchen, the toilet. (yes i have an obsession with the loo)

and the reason is not about being 'fake'. i may be comfortable living in 'dirty' conditions, but my guests might not, and as a host my primary responsibility is to make sure my guests are comfortable. the toilet is an intimate area, you don't want to worry about getting fungal/bacterial/viral infection because you used a dirty toilet. the kitchen is where you prepare food, you don't want your guests coming to see the state of your kitchen and wondering if the food you cook is really properly edible or whether they will get food poisoning from poor kitchen cleanliness.

and then theres the discussion about being a woman:

basically my 'defence' to cleaning my toilet before my mum came was that i didnt want her going on about how i'm not fit to be a woman, which i said in a half joking manner. clearly it didnt quite come across as a joke cos my friend was appalled: "utter rubbish, ur fitness to be a woman bears no relation to the state of your toilet; u do not have to make ur toilet sparkle just to prove to society or ur mum that u r a woman." my darling mum has her curious definitions of being a woman, like knowing how to wash dishes in her unique systematic way, or combing your hair every morning, or having a neat room. it probably rubbed off a little on me and my definition of being a good woman includes having a proper standard of hygiene. maybe i'm the only one going to people's houses and passing judgement on people's standard of hygiene based on kitchen and toilet cleanliness. i'm not doubting that i am a woman, and i'm not proving that i'm a woman. i have my personal principles and i keep by them.

besides, if my mum, after seeing the state of my toilet, decides to scrub it down for me. she's not going to stop just because i say so, and her scrubbing down my toilet is going to make me feel awful. doesn't that kind of show that I still need my mum to clean up after me?

coffee and baileys is keeping me up longer than i should.

wisewords

Winston Churchill: "One ought never to turn one's back on a threatened danger and try to run away from it. If you do that, you will double the danger. But if you meet it promptly and without flinching, you will reduce the danger by half."

music genius

the lyrics are amazing. and so is the use of 5/4 beats in the verses, and the seamless transition from 5/4 to 6/4.

exams

bane of my life.

i don't know whether i wish for them to be more drawn out. just don't have enough time, brain space and brain power for the last 2. argh effects of exhaustion. and now i'm tired before lunch, my tummy feels strange when it is hungry and still feels strange when i eat, and because i'm already tired i think post prandial lethargy will be worse. maybe i need some chocs and brain stimulants.

make the deaf hear, make the blind see

Today I watched videos from a couple who have lots of tattoos and piercings, their videos was about their really cute babies..

and I watched a couple of videos about pink dot 2010.

and I thought sometimes the people who look flawed on the outside, are the people who are least flawed on the inside. and those who look perfect on the outside could be motivated by all the wrong things, they are merely building up a kingdom of self.

and I realised that my ability to embrace people who are different from me, who are different from the norm, reflects what I value on the inside..

For the time will come when men will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. 2 Timothy 4:3

are you only listening to what you want to hear?

this is so true.

when sin dehumanises people..
Because sin is antisocial, it tends to dehumanize the people in our lives.
No longer are they objects of our willing affection. No, they quit being the people we find joy in loving.
Rather, they get reduced to one of two things. They are either vehicles to help us get what we want or obstacles in the way of what we want.
When your wife is meeting the demands of your wants, needs, and feelings, you are quite excited about her, and you treat her with affection.
But when she becomes an obstacle in the way of your wants, needs, and feelings, you have a hard time hiding your disappointment, impatience, and irritation.

This is where another eloquent biblical observation comes in. It is that we are kingdom-oriented people. We always live in the service of one of two kingdoms.We live in service of the small, personal happiness agenda of the kingdom of self, or we live in service of the huge, origin-to-destiny agenda of the kingdom of God.
From TGC

on womanhood

http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/justintaylor/2011/05/05/susan-hunt-redeeming-womanhood/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+between2worlds+%28Between+Two+Worlds%29

i'm going to need to start enjoying writing..

"I think it's far more important to write well than most people realize. Writing doesn't just communicate ideas; it generates them. If you're bad at writing and don't like to do it, you'll miss out on most of the ideas writing would have generated." http://www.paulgraham.com/writing44.html

mol and cell biol TO immuno

forget minuscule. think GLOBAL.

Today David Stroud said he observed that

Men who grow up without a Father lack the strength required of Manhood, not physical strength but emotional strength, strength of character, to deal with difficult issues.

Women who grow up without a Father lack the affirmation of self worth, and turn to other things for that, one such is pleasing others with sexual favours.

wow.

From Lee Weiling's column in Mar 2010

"I am with Mahatma Gandhi on this score. When asked once if he felt under-dressed when he met the King of England and Emperor of India, he replied: 'The King was wearing enough clothes for both of us.'

Part of the reason I share this sentiment is that I detest the consumerism so rife in our society. I see many of my patients, especially the older adolescent and young women, dressed in clothes that must cost them at least half their monthly salaries. I also see wealthy women dressed in fabulous concoctions that must cost the equivalent of many months of a bus driver's salary.

I try to remind myself that it is their right to spend their money as they wish. My personal values are mine, and I have no right to impose them on others or judge others by my own yardstick.

Still, I would discourage my readers and friends from placing too high an emphasis on their attire, whether it be undergarments or over-garments. Like other material possessions, expensive clothes are 'red dust', giving their wearers only a transient illusion of physical beauty.

Physical beauty will eventually fade. To place too great an emphasis on it will one day cause psychological distress.

By renouncing as many items of 'red dust' as possible, we would be less tied down emotionally by material luxuries and we would become better and more charitable people."

At some point in the future, should someone compile all of lee weiling's essays in Sunday Times into a book I will buy many copies of it.

Today's message says

you don't go to find meaning in life, you bring meaning to your life.

Meaning isn't something out there waiting for you to discover. The meaning of your life is what you infuse it with - beauty or ugliness, happiness or sadness. It is totally your choice, and God wants it to be your choice because God gave you free will.

omg i cant believe i'm making myself drink tomato juice to get rid of my stuck nose. it is disgusting, and diluting it out just increases the volume. it is salty and sour at the same time and my taste buds are so overwhelmed.. eeks eeks. seems like the only way to get it down is to add chilli oh my my..

today i realised that of all the labs i've gone to, there's one thing in common: you can bring food food and more food and no one will ever get tired of it

The good man and the power of forgiveness

“David Marshall is responsible for 200 murderers walking freely the streets of Singapore.”

http://thinkhappiness.blogspot.com/2006/08/meeting-david-marshall-in-1994.html

10,000 words really feel like word diarrhoea.

2 consecutive 3 ams. i'm going to KO tmr.

Through you all things are possible to him who believes -thanks james.

when sight makes you blind

i think some of the most important things to 'see' are things that you need to close your eyes and feel

needs and strength

I always warned myself against needing anyone too much. The more you need and depend on someone else, the less you're able to stand on your own, the weaker you become. But there's one, where the more you go to Him, the more you need Him, the more you're able to draw strength from Him, and this strength will not run out.

what is a levels..

when u come to final year at uni. i wished my first 2 years could pre-empt the difficulty of 3rd year. oh my god.

today's message says

that family is not a name for a group of people, but the quality of relationships between them.

Relationships grounded in mutual love, trust, caring and forgiveness. In all the ups and all the downs of life. Look closely, - who is really your family, and who in truth are just strangers in for the ride?

Fruit of the Spirit

Love Joy Peace Patience Kindness Goodness Faithfulness Gentleness and Self-Control

a day of good things

sun! greece! and my graduation photo! omg!

girls (and guys) should bother less about the way they look and bother more about the way they behave. you can only change how you look to a small extent after big expenditure, but you can change the way you behave without monetary cost and yet affect so many people more deeply.

in the mood

for everything except shopping and studying. haha never thought they would one day fall in the same category

shopping is the bane of my life

ok so i know i need new clothes. but nothing in the shops really entice me. how?