A nice post that almost completely exemplifies what I feel about most men

http://www.thegrrl.com/2008/08/dont-you-wish-youd-had-divorce-cake.html

is thankful

for everyone who has been lending me support, and showing me what I could do.

important messages from an important book

you won't be happy with a partner until you can be happy on your own

you cant change people

get to know someone through all the seasons before making any major decisions

dont stay with someone who doesnt care

put each other first

accept the differences, embrace what you have in common

don't belittle your partner

let not the sun go down upon your wrath

be the last to quarrel and the first to make up

never stop trying to be attractive

dont dump responsibility on your partner

listen to what they are NOT saying

most everyday arguments are about something else

you don't both have to have the same rules

give them space for themselves

keep the moral high ground

treat them the way you think is right, no matter how they treat you

find friends who love the truth

never lend money unless you're prepared to write it off

when one finger points forwards, 3 point back

know when to let go

bitterness helps no one

On this day,

On this day of your life, Xin Zi, we believe God wants you to know ... that happiness has nothing to do with pleasure.

You feel pleasure when you want something and you get it. Or when you don't want something and you remove it. Pleasure is always relative. Happiness is absolute. Happiness is the understanding and acceptance of life as it is in this very moment as completely perfect, because every creation of God is perfect. The degree to which you do not accept life in all of the Divine forms is the degree to which you suffer.

i miss..

i miss the nice random chats my little brother and i used to have

i miss minute maid lemonade and all their other juices at the vending machine in the rj canteen

i miss chilling at timbre

i miss the ice lemon tea and curry puffs we had after PE

i miss lying on my balcony watching the sky change colour at 7pm

i miss the dark skies from which if i squint hard enough i can count the stars

i miss bird watching

i miss bat spotting

i miss going out in just one layer and wearing slippers out

i miss the sound of the sea

i miss the simple life i once had.

Listening to Everything by Lifehouse for its peace.

i am not meaning to plagiarise.

i am just really in love with how kaufmann and walker writes about microbial attacks on human hosts:

"Indeed, pathogens have developed a broad arsenal of different survival strategies in the macroorganisms, which for convenience and with the risk of oversimplification can be categorized in terms of warfare. Toxin producers such as anthrax bacilli have chosen biowarfare, whereby the toxin rather than the pathogen itself attacks the human host. Other microorganisms such as influenza virus have chosen a ‘blitzkrieg’ strategy to overwhelm the host rapidly. At the other end of the spectrum, several pathogens such as Mycobacterium tuberculosis or herpes viruses have chosen trench warfare; this allows for an apparently peaceful coexistence over long periods of time, with the risk of disease activation at a later time point once the host defense line has been weakened. Others are even more malicious. HIV, for example, has chosen guerrilla warfare, undermining host defense by attacking the central regulator of the immune response — the helper T cells. Equally malignant are pathogens such as Trypanosoma cruzi that initiate a civil war in which the immune response attacks our own host cells under the false impression that it is attacking the invaders."

such a sleek analogy.

taken from Kaufmann SHE and Walker BD, Host Pathogen Interactions, (2006), Current Opinion Immunology, 18:371-373.

somehow when i click 'next blog' at the top of people's blogs, and just keep going next next next... i keep seeing blogs parents keep about pregnancy, fertility, little babies, and lots and lots of pictures of little babies..

so distracted. i must go back to smooth muscle relaxing and contracting drugs, diabetic drugs, coagulants and fibrinolytics, and fertility drugs... 1 more day! omggg >_<

i wish the sun stayed out a little longer

oh give me a home

where the buffalo roam

where the deer and the antelope play

where seldom is heard

a discouraging word

and the skies are not cloudy all day

this christmas

is soo very cold.

is a christmas I want to forget.

is the turning point that will change the rest of my life

i know i've eaten a lot...but..

pants used to be worn on the waist. and the sizes used to be 27, 28, 29, 30....nowadays it is worn on the hip.. i'm sure designers know whether the pants they made are to be worn on the waist or on the hip..and the sizes haven't changed. but do the sizes now refer to dimensions of the waist or dimensions of the hip? cos if the same dimensions refer to that of the hip, i doubt anyone fits in the S sizes, and people with asses cant fit into XL sizes. a size 29 from IP zone is loose on my hips and might require a belt, but a size 29 from a pasar malam feels like tights. one is 3+ inches smaller than the other! i shall have to bring soft rulers with me when i go shopping next time..

Spot the Bird!!

Unfortunately I can't provide the answer to this one. u either see it or you don't. but heres a link that could teach you to see it: http://www.netaxs.com/~mhmyers/seeum.html

food galore...

4aug dim sum at Red Star restaurant Chin Swee Road, with lab peoples. good stuff. just unfortunate that they didnt have charsiew cheong fun

7aug karaoke night at NTU alumni at Biopolis. followed by a delicious dinner at 9pm. stingray buffet, yam basket, coffee pork ribs, etc. great food great company

8aug beginning of movie week: Role Models, Slumdog Millionaire, Benjamin Button, Marley and me and Revolutionary Road. we had a good meal at haato too. i liked the curry katsu, the unagi pasta is still as great, my brother loved the mud pie, and the other had a waffle with cookies and cream, but the best ice creams were mine, yuzu sorbet, rock melon and green tea with red bean. we also got the sweet potato one but it wasnt that tasty

9aug national day at grampa's place, pumpkin rice that my mum cooked, and saying the pledge together at the pledge moment, recalling the chinese pledge

10aug discovering PRAWN TOAST yummmm

11aug found out that rum goes well with pepsi and lime

13aug getting reminded of dark times

14aug died trying to weave my way through orchard and squeeze onto a bus home

15aug the epic food trail: kaya toast, ondeh ondeh, goreng pisang, crayfish ipoh hor fun, barley beancurd with ginko, charsiew and prawn cheong fun (they also have mushroom and chicken and scallops O_O), sg day rojak with the perfect mix of sweet sour and spicy, curry puff with extraodinary stuffings like yam, rochor beancurd house, sold out satay, popiah oyster omelette hokkien mee fried kway teow at newton; along the way discovering new (actually old) and cheap places to shop!

dedicated to happy days =)

jun13 Comms parade

met people i didnt expect to meet, died in the heat and enjoyed sitting at the spectators seats in pitch black with his sisters listening to music. probably the last time i looked a least bit slender haha

jun15 or 16.. Seoul garden with sisters!

ate soooo much..and we all came out complaining how we stank of seoul garden. saw iluma and tried some coolio green tea yoghurt or something similar they were giving out in front of iluma.

jun18 cast =_=

got casted after a fall the previous day

jun20 felt so liberated to be at suntec city walking with a cast an umbrella plastic over it and crutches haha..

jun26 cast removed! YES!

jun28 comms ball at St Regis

yay i have one nice picture for good memories of good food, painted mirrors and aching feet. and a very nice uncle who sent me home =)

jul3 monkeying around at holland v with all the sisters! lol

jul4 be the first to see the ndp parade and concert! and the first few to get the funpack! haha i feel so happy that i swapped mine with someone so i got my colour!

jul10 birthday buffet!

Ellenborough Market at Merchant Court Swissotel. CRABBY buffet on a seat facing Clarke quay. pretty pretty place..but i was too busy eating and the camera just did not agree with my crab filled fingers haha i remember someone gulping down oysters like there was no tomorrow (and ended up feeling shitty the next day), i remember a durian mousse which cannot be described for fear that no one will eat it. i remember yam ice cream, and so many other desserts. i remember staying away from risotto. i remember the delicious and huge chili crab which was the best lol

jul11 the only saturday where gerald had excuse from ndp rehearsal

i remember an illegal dinner haha which was meant to be quick cos we wanted to go see the night festival. we took advantage of the free entry to national museum which incidentally i've never stepped in before. and quite cool. old shutters, glass display, love not war cannons, and a rather eerie wayang and movies exhibit. and it poured and poured and we decided the pyrotechnics were too late and probably werent going to happen in this rain, and it took a long time for us both tired people to go home.

jul12 ice age dawn of the dinosaurs with 2 little dinosaurs haha! after which we entertained them at the library, with bubble tea, and eventually at gerald's house. how fun! dinner for gerald's mum's bday at a restaurant at a void deck which didnt have the a la carte buffet that we were hoping it had, but was a good meal nonetheless.

jul13 strudel house!

jul14 the bday no-surprise cake for gerald's mum.

from the place with a name that is difficult to remember. Rive Gauche. Orange cake. pretty cool.

jul16 Thai express dinner and swensens dessert with the girls that i've known for ages.

jul17 food fair at isetan and taka, harry potter and a surprise bday party

jul18 a cloudy day at Sentosa which almost didnt end up at Sentosa. sigh why no sun???

jul19 a nice gathering of 3 people. chatting randomly and enjoying wearing skirts.. plus ice cream at island creamery! =D=D

jul23 sick =S then later migraine. =S

jul29 kuishin bo buffet where i got so stuffed i had to regulate breathing to prevent puking haha.. first time i see marina barrage also. was so sunny and nice! then off to labrador park for fishing! and then dinner with choir girls =)

jul30 the grossest day of animal training.

aug1 first time eating at new york new york and getting a birthday discount although it was supposedly invalid. plus bday present! that big cute bowl-cup. also the day i realised i could borrow from esplanade library and borrow 200 music sheets in 2 books! suddenly feel like i'm productive!

aug2 NAC Exxonmobil Concert in the Park

picnic with sweet sweet peaches, kaya toast and ham sandwiches. plus budak pantai! haha i love the pedra blanca song hehehe =P and the cutest most balloon pooh bear!

if i had to go back tomorrow,

i shall be very very reluctant.

Summer

summer is a good time. it is the excuse for frens to meet up. old frens from no matter how long ago. For if there is no summer holiday and everyone is boringly in singapore all the time, then there will be no special reason to meet up. somehow there must (almost) always be a reason before one can be encouraged to attend a meet up. i wonder how long it'll take for us to get bored of chatting about the past.. maybe never..

有时候逃避是唯一的解决方式

我回来，因为不想再感受在别处的一些沉重
原来家里也沉重

still in hibernation. will be back soon.. another 8 weeks.

holidayyy

yayy
my last 3 days has been so great =D
day before yesterday was christmas eve. was supposed to go carolling for CCF at KKH but turned out the Straits Times anyhow say, cannot want to go and sing then just go. then end up we go there already but were told that cannot join them. so become girls morning out. and very early morning indeed. met up with xiumin and yilun and we went from KKH to Novena and then to Orchard where xiumz and i got yilun famous amos to help her feel better after an awfully screwed up morning. shopped around chatted a bit, we lingered at Topshop for a while to try random clothes, while i got more excited by the extremely tall shoes - stilletto heels plus platformed fronts. hehehe explored the rest of isetan, went to zara walk walk yadayada. Xiumz and I had a good lunch at far east plaza, and wanted to get minute maid limeade but found the price had risen from $1.30 to $2.30 =( time passed quickly and I soon left for home.

lingered, waited, felt like maybe i should have spent the time doing a bit of my essay but i didnt know if i was going to have that much time..in the end i napped away the time until i was called to go downstairs =) got picked up to go geralds place on his way back after booking out, passed gerard his big pack of christmas presents, then to geralds house.

i was amazed by the spread of food. maybe its just because i never had a christmas dinner. turkey stuffed with rice, smoked salmon (omg it was great), ham, sausages, salad, mashed potatoes.. all we lacked was a fireplace. but in singapore so hot if got fireplace we'll all melt in heat. then dessert! really nice pineapple tarts and very good log cake. so christmassy. went over to james place and got so immersed in christmas spirit, with carolling and all. so fun =)
finally headed home to realise i forgot to buy breakfast lol

yesterday morning wake up, wash hair, had a bowl of oatmeals (which was supposed to be filling..) then left to meet up with gerald's family for christmas service. so happening everybody come. like new year like that everyone look beautiful. and i didnt feel out of place wearing my santa claus hat. (lol after coming back from london go out always feel like bringing some head gear..) everyone seem to know everyone, james' brother kept nodding off, vania made nice brownies-in-a-cup, lol and i got hungry in the middle of service hehe..

lunch was at maxwell food centre, i think i passed it so many times but never knew whats it called. and here's when i start ticking off good food that i've intended to have ever since coming back to singapore. we had what we used to call 'michael jackson' back then in the rj canteen - soya bean milk plus grass jelly. gerald got his char kway teow which i stole a bit of, and i got my fishball meepok which i've been ranting about for a while.. somehow i feel like i could get better fishball meepok at toh yi =S but its okay. nowadays good fishballs make me very happy already. we took a walk along one of the roads behind chinatown area, gerald got a really really nice egg tart from this very old stall, and we went looking for this dessert shop that has been featured in quite a few food shows. we finally found it after taking pictures with very cute forever friends bears at chinatown point. 记得吃. somehow despite its simple name i have trouble remembering it. i ordered a 鸳鸯 which has sesame paste and almond cream mixed together, and i added some 汤圆 to it. yay for 芝麻汤圆, and got 2 more 花生汤圆 for gerald. so since i ordered warm dessert, he ordered a cold one, 蛋白马蹄炖西米露 which was coolly nice =) feeling so happily full after having so much food, we walked a bit more to help digestion, and took a bus back to his place.

along the way we stopped at novena square to borrow some dvds to watch, bought breakfast at mama bakery (which according to gerald, has brilliant chocolate bread - i bought and tried, its really nice =) met up with his mum and lil sis originally intending to buy some japanese goodies, but didnt really get anything. had dinner at his house, although it was leftovers from yesterday it was still a delicious meal. [though unfortunately i'm not a fan of pumpkin soup...]

gerald and i then left to meet james and sara and we all headed to cafe del mar. very interesting concept, with daybeds and gabbanas. except those have minimum spending. if dun wanna spend too much, can choose a normal table which will be indoors, or if you want to be in the outdoors on the beach, just grab the benches =) they look like suntanning benches, really suits the beach. the music is kinda weird though (i like their website music more). we had chicken wings, which was really good on its own. and we had nachos which was a generous serving. gerald said i should try a martini so we got a lychee martini, james and sara got margerita, and we also further ordered this thingy that was very cold (lots of ice) and tasted nicely sweet: it had baileys =D it was a cooling night, with very light drizzle so we had to move in from our benches to the tables, but it was a nice stroll along the beach nonetheless.

this morning woke up at 844am, wanting more sleep, so slept a bit more until about 10.. nice cool morning. went to meet gerald and his mum at isetan scotts for the anniversary sale. i didnt know this is a yearly affair until now. spent more than i really should, and took up a lot of time. tried to find the 5 dollars huge can of popcorn at the market in the basement of paragon but i guess it got snatched up. had lunch at this place called 华艺面点小吃, where I had 酸辣汤面， geralds's mum had 榨菜鸡丝面, gerald had 牛肉面, and we also had some sides -小笼包 and 锅贴. good northern china food =) went over the geralds to watch music and lyrics, which was a nice movie. and then went for dinner at serangoon gardens. gerald calls this place one of our national treasures, and while eating here i was also wishing they could come up with a chompchomp clone in london. maybe if they did the rest of the london eateries will have such terrible business they'll close down. lol we ordered a lot of good food!! sambal stingray, satay, sambal potato leaves =D gerald was in the mood for mee goreng as well. there was so much spice we had to get 2 big drinks lol. 1 watermelon juice and 1 grass jelly. and i was sooo full after that. then they had this little corner upstairs of this row of shophouses: nice dessert place called dessert bowl: 一碗甜品, and they had brilliant desserts as well, except i have absolutely no space in my tummy for them and got more engrossed in herworld magazine and mayday concert on dvd as my brain slowly shut down. so ends my happy happy day, i see more to come! =)

Sunset at 330pm

it gets dark so early here..