just a flip of the page away

it took me less than 1 minute to take down/keep away the photos so that my place can be neutral again. and I thought I had brought all the letters back to Singapore. But then I discovered one under the telephone, my itchy fingers opened it and I read it, and then the days when my room had companions came back to me. and the sunny weather reminded me of our picnic. and it hurt. just a little more

I miss you because

when you were around my pens always had refills.

Inert

As people grow up, we start to deal with things, some of which hurt us, some of which make us happy, some that deeply affect us. A lot of times the same things affect us differently

my lack of response is almost always explained as denial

the first death I had to deal with was my grandma. she was having a difficult time. when she left, all the grand children weren't there. i was 15. i remember trying to make myself cry because it seemed like it was the right thing to do. maybe all those scriptures we had to chant was good at numbifying me. i was upset, but i didn't intensely feel a sense of loss

and then I was 18 and there was a death in the next door class. a suicide. i didnt feel upset at all. maybe i was caught up with my own issues

and then a break up

and then a couple of days ago an accident. we certainly knew each other. but we weren't close. we shared lots of mutual friends. and therefore it is all over my facebook feed. and my first reaction was, things happen, a lot of the times they cant be expected. so we just move on like we have a long time more to live, whether that is really true or not, you'll only know at the turn of the next corner. no i'm not grieving, i don't think i am.

remember 500 days of summer? remember summer? maybe when you come from a dysfunctional family/live through a particularly turbulent bit of family troubles, everything feels insignificant, because it is quickly learnt that nothing is permanent, some less so than others

I really don't want to be here.

I really shouldn't have been so last minute also.

Why wouldnt the embassies be nice to me.

If I go overseas to study again, I'll make sure I'm somewhere where its sunny and warm and rarely cold. So sick of cold weather. Cold countries should be for tourism only.

greener grass

Seems like a lot of my friends in singapore left singapore this summer

everyone wants to study overseas

everyone wants to go on exchange programmes

it seems imperative that excellent students must have had overseas study experiences

for a more slack curriculum?

for a chance to travel and holiday?

for a better education?

networking?

at the end of the day (even though it is not the end yet) what have I really carried away from my overseas study experience?

i learnt how irritating electricity companies are

i learnt how cold weather can be really depressing

i learnt that nowhere else is water as dependable as in sg

i learnt to cook

i learnt that it is difficult to look after yourself, taking care of food, work and the house

do i really think i'm getting a better education here?

have i travelled enough?

if studying overseas is better then why do I find my flatmates and I dragging ourselves over from homeland? we always cant wait to go home and put off coming back to as late as possible

i'm just feeling so tired, i don't wanna get out of the house, i'm not going to the supermarket and get food, replace things that are running out in the house, my brain knows i need to go think about my project area but my body just doesn't want to work on it at all. and it's aching from oversleeping. my energy left me in may

landing on a Sunday

There are nice things about landing on a Sunday

when you're the first in the city

almost no one else is awake

those who are greet you warmly in the cool breeze

no rush in getting luggage up steps at Leicester square stn

and you get to sleep another 2 hours

before the city starts to buzz and you can start getting things done

And then there are also the not so nice things

Sunday is work late end work early day

shops open for 4-6 hours

so if your lethargy gets you out of the house at 4pm

you're probably not going to get anything done

therefore just stay in and chill

and tomorrow things will begin again

晚上的空虚用音乐来填

today's message says...

that what you are most afraid of is where your greatest rewards are

If all you had to do was wish for something and you would have it, life would be pretty boring, wouldn't it? God placed barriers between us and what we want, so we can enjoy interesting and satisfying lives. God hid our biggest rewards behind the highest barriers - our deepest fears. God wants us to face our fears, and hold ground in their presence, and let them go, and that's how we get out biggest rewards. What are you most afraid of? Say it, just start by saying it.

心中是清楚的
有一天有一天都会停的
让时间说真话
虽然我也害怕
在天黑了以后
我们都不知道会不会有以后

亲爱的为什么
也许你也不懂
两个相爱的人
等对方先说找分开的理由

我好想好想飞 逃离这个疯狂世界 那么多苦那么多累 那么多莫名的泪水

恐怕飞也飞不出这疯狂世界

厌食

以前我爱吃到可以吃自助餐吃到吐也过瘾

现在总是饭没吃完，然后又容易饿，怎么好吃都不合胃口

病好以来都没有好好地吃

有时候都不懂肚子是饿，不舒服，还是要吐

还是肚子忘记怎样消化食物

这是种病状吗？

today's message says...

Love is the opening of the heart, the welcoming of your beloved. Loving is not secure, authentic loving is risky. Security lies behind the walls of a closed heart. You either invite the union by opening in love, or you secure the isolation by closing down.

I can live without

I spent an enjoyable afternoon with the choir girls chatting, wondering about how our gynae in the future might be some guy we knew in high school.. that even the old lady at the counter couldn't help but smile at us

I watched an amazing movie with my brother, pretending to be 16 year old while my brother wished he was 18 so he could watch the expendables. discovered strange $4 fries that's so filling it could be dinner

Tasted coffee from brazil and from ethiopia and for once realised that coffee have varying degrees of sourness (as well as bitterness) I seemed to always have been preoccupied with the bitterness

Met a lot of people, realised strange ways that people you know in different parts of your life come to know each other (really I think there is just one degree of separation when it comes to your peers), had awesome salmon escarole tagliatelle at oriole cafe, if only I had tummy space for sticky pudding...

such a chore

if only all i have to do to lose citizenship is to join the army

i can so imagine the lady i was speaking to rolling her eyes and getting pissed off that i had not planned this properly. i mean there are so many million things in my life that need planning who was to have thought that this required planning too!

maybe people who work in these offices are taught to tell people how the system will not work for them and not how the system could be made to work

everybody is upset

one is having a stomach upset, finding everything inadequate, moaning about aches and work

one is trying to stay calm while trying to do a million things at a time despite being very tired

one is away

one is sleeping and too tired to help himself

and I am watching and trying to help but providing no help

seems like it is wired into our heads that the first thing we all want to do is to tell others what to do without first understanding why others don't want to do it that way

my mum has mastered the skill of driving despite having her eyes clouded by tears or brain tired from managing

all seem to be in precarious positions, but I don't know what to do to pull them back

of everyone I seem the most relaxed, a number of things to do that I haven't quite gotten down to doing because there seems to be still time.. plans that I think will likely be drastically changed when the times comes. passing time doing everything non-constructive.

when we all try to manage, we opt for just the liveable, happiness is out of the picture.

how did we get here? maybe that question is no longer relevant.

army

either my brother isn't making his situation urgent/serious enough or the army is trying to make my brother a cripple. who will pay if and when that happens?

a tourist in a changing home

a skyline is beautiful not really because it is beautiful in itself, but because it is familiar, a place you once loved

when it has changed, it will make you feel like you're a tourist

until you see it frequently enough to associate it with familiar things

the first time

i actually feel nearly intoxicated

i feel like i know exactly how she had felt.. because for the past day i've been daring myself to do exactly what she did. i didn't do it.. i wonder if i would've regretted if i did

was going to take a panadol, and realised that alcohol and panadol can't go together, especially when i don't know the dose of alcohol i took.

so i have stayed away for a long time and will be away still for a longer time. and i had wanted something to stay constant, just so that when i return something will stay familiar. but nothing will stay the same. and maybe at the end of it all, home will become another environment that i will have to adapt to, a new place like those that i've moved to and moved from over these years (and the years that will come)

熟悉的人，熟悉的环境，过了多久时间才会变成完全陌生...

sometimes i wish i have just one 'home', and the rest of the world can just be holiday/vacation/getaway spots

I want you to know

you couldn't have loved me better..

even I didnt recognise it. it was just PMS.

today's message says...

My soul needs nourishment and really wants the freedom to sing and dance and love.

I think I've had enough of this city. Even though there are still many things I haven't done here, maybe I'm just really tired from the things I'm doing here. It is not over yet though, there's still this final week of experiments and poster preparation. And there are thank you notes to be written.

Staying in the US is unhealthy. I eat too much take out food that costs at least $5 usually up to $7. Instead of having cookies I have pretzels and cereal. I don't walk enough (although this is most probably due to the weather) and I think what bothers me most is that it really burns a hole in my pocket.

I wish I could enjoy what I'm doing more.

you are awesome

i just want u to know that no matter what happens

dun forget life has miracles

we are a miracle

and dun waste ur effort in self-pity or worry

just focus every ounce u have

every laksa-induced calorie

into doing any experiments well

and doing them to the best

u are only as lousy as u think u are

I should just go home now

There's no way I can finish the project anyway. So I should just go home now. Working hard doesn't seem to help me get results so I should just slack.

japanese eating in america

So I was in charge of catering food for today's journal club. And I got japanese food. We had a pretty tight budget, so I got about 206 sushi for 26 people, and ordered some more beef negimaki and gyozas and vege tempura. So the sides were very well received. They were familiar food.

somehow sushi was not so familiar. Everyone seemed very concerned about what they were eating. In particular, there was a lot of the fish sushis left behind, you know those with a slice of tuna/salmon/yellowtail/whitefish on top of a clump of rice? And I thought those were the ones that most people will clamour for. Turns out people here have a certain repulsion against raw fish. but what is japanese food without fish! the fish was delicious, I had an amazing meal. There were quite a lot of peanut avocado rolls left also which were ingenious inventions. There were a couple of the Jack Roll, which has shrimp in mayo caviar, and Philly roll - smoked salmon with cream cheese and cucumber, left and those 2 were my predicted favourites cos I thought those probably suited the American taste buds more. And the vege sushis - mango avocado and cucumber; asparagus avocado and cucumber - those were very well received. it was very strange.

If I were better advised, I would have gotten double the amount of sides and half the amount of sushi.

movies

i want to watch when i get back.. i hope its showing at home

charlie st cloud

eat pray love

inception

bounty hunter

my dad

is amazing at his work

but i've never experienced that side of him before.

somebody stole my ice cream

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/09/10/fashion/10love.html?ref=modernlove

read at the wrong time

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/04/fashion/04love.html?ref=modernlove

in a new place

i hate how i look like my dad. esp when i'm uploading photos.

from today onwards

let things go a little more slow motion... I'd like everyday to drag on a little more. because i know the next 3 weeks will fly by before I know it

Summer Rain

It's pouring. the rare kind of pouring in london. the kind that makes enough noise to give you some peace. but then the clouds will hide the moon that shines on me..

smells nice after the rain

and yesterday's pretty awesome lunch =)

I see the moon and the moon sees me...

There is a certain sense of comfort in seeing that the moon I see shining over me is exactly the same as the one I see shining over me in Singapore.

whoever it is that is governing the things going on in this world, he hates me.

i must mug

after 1 hour of very lousy bejeweled playing.

Further infection by TB is curbed by a CMI response. sounds so CMI to me. =S

a little pharmacology

my heart needs increased parasympathetic inhibition

my nucleus accumbens needs to increase dopamine signalling

i need to be less stupid

another week has passed

I eat my cookies and walk all over the place, dropping crumbs as I walk.

Luckily I don't have ants here. yet.

Napped too long.

I woke up after way too much sleep for a nap, because I dreamt

I dreamt of my mum, I saw her face flat and puffy like dough, blotches that suddenly became so much more visible, cheeks sagging to her knees, and all those puffiness obscuring her features, just like how it was when she came.

I dreamt of my grandma, her quiet caring nature, she was healthy looking, not scrawny tired and hungry like she was when she left me, she had the face I remembered from my childhood days.

I dreamt of my grandpa, he was sickly and tired, and was leaning against rails while sitting, he was skinnier than I had ever remembered.

It was a nightmare.

marathon!

my duckduck finished her marathon! far from winning, but i still think my duckduck is more successful that i am.

是否一样

都带着昨天的伤试图想要遗忘

take care

take care of my summer

take care of my mum

take care of my work

take care of my friends

an unlucky day

missed appointments and failed grocery shopping. and a reminder that I have yet to secure a summer attachment. I'm such a failure today..

lets hope my lack of luck will not affect the luck of the people around me

I was told I should be less apologetic, and stop feeling like I'm not doing enough. Even if I really am. So that people will not bully me. Because I'm worth more than I think. Why does this sound so familiar.. did I hear something similar at JLC..

and for some strange reason, I feel colder in the day and warmer in the night. what kind of weird creature am I.

lost the point

I feel so bad to have made you go to sleep miserably. I feel sorry to have convinced you to change the purpose of your trip. We had high expectations that time would not allow. Maybe there is a reason for all this 'so close but so far' feeling.

and now even if I wanted you to stay you couldn't.

We always make do with the little time that we have. I'm miserable too.

transition

a massive outpouring.

a year of generosity.

too much cooking.

the irony of it all

so I was having trouble getting profs to mentor me, and I had wanted to apply for summer research grants but because I couldnt get profs therefore I couldnt apply.

I cant believe now I'm helping someone else submit his (almost late) application for the grant. the one I wanted. Don't ask me how I'm going to bring myself to do it.

to eat:

Udders waffles

No 18 Zion Road Fried Kway Teow
Zion Road Riverside Food Centre

my mess

on the side of me by corrinne may

I'm not the easiest person to love
I'm often the one who lets things go unresolved

Yet you choose to be
on the side of me
on the side of me
Yet you choose to be on the side of me
on the side of me

I'm not too proud of some things
I've done in my life
The skeletons in my closet
Are too big for me to hide

Yet you choose to be
on the side of me
on the side of me
Blessed Charity
You're on the side of me
on the side of me

Everyone needs a friend to hold
when it's cold outside
and there's no place to go
Everyone needs a friend to hold
all alone I cried
there was no place to go
I remember when nobody cared
but you

I'm not the easiest person to love
But you, you've opened your heart to show me what I'm worth

'Cause you choose to be
on the side of me
on the side of me
What a mystery
You're on the side of me
on the side of me

Everyone needs a friend to hold
when it's cold outside
and there's no place to go
Everyone needs a friend to hold
all alone I cried
there was no place to go

I remember when nobody cared
Nobody cared
But you...

Yeah you choose to be
on the side of me
on the side of me

a long time ago

i remember how i used to kiss my dad goodnight, even if he was in the middle of the news or some random tv show. one night he stopped me because his psoriasis was getting worse at the scalp, had spread to the back and going to go all over the body, and he was also getting some on the face and he didnt want me eating his medications.

how long will it take

for me to be happy again?

Xinzi...

sniffs,

sleeps,

works,

cooks,

stresses,

laughs,

stones,

writes,

thinks,

hugs,

wonders,

plans,

worries,

chats,

hides,

cries.

WATCH!

A nice post that almost completely exemplifies what I feel about most men

http://www.thegrrl.com/2008/08/dont-you-wish-youd-had-divorce-cake.html

is thankful

for everyone who has been lending me support, and showing me what I could do.

important messages from an important book

you won't be happy with a partner until you can be happy on your own

you cant change people

get to know someone through all the seasons before making any major decisions

dont stay with someone who doesnt care

put each other first

accept the differences, embrace what you have in common

don't belittle your partner

let not the sun go down upon your wrath

be the last to quarrel and the first to make up

never stop trying to be attractive

dont dump responsibility on your partner

listen to what they are NOT saying

most everyday arguments are about something else

you don't both have to have the same rules

give them space for themselves

keep the moral high ground

treat them the way you think is right, no matter how they treat you

find friends who love the truth

never lend money unless you're prepared to write it off

when one finger points forwards, 3 point back

know when to let go

bitterness helps no one

On this day,

On this day of your life, Xin Zi, we believe God wants you to know ... that happiness has nothing to do with pleasure.

You feel pleasure when you want something and you get it. Or when you don't want something and you remove it. Pleasure is always relative. Happiness is absolute. Happiness is the understanding and acceptance of life as it is in this very moment as completely perfect, because every creation of God is perfect. The degree to which you do not accept life in all of the Divine forms is the degree to which you suffer.

i miss..

i miss the nice random chats my little brother and i used to have

i miss minute maid lemonade and all their other juices at the vending machine in the rj canteen

i miss chilling at timbre

i miss the ice lemon tea and curry puffs we had after PE

i miss lying on my balcony watching the sky change colour at 7pm

i miss the dark skies from which if i squint hard enough i can count the stars

i miss bird watching

i miss bat spotting

i miss going out in just one layer and wearing slippers out

i miss the sound of the sea

i miss the simple life i once had.

Listening to Everything by Lifehouse for its peace.

i am not meaning to plagiarise.

i am just really in love with how kaufmann and walker writes about microbial attacks on human hosts:

"Indeed, pathogens have developed a broad arsenal of different survival strategies in the macroorganisms, which for convenience and with the risk of oversimplification can be categorized in terms of warfare. Toxin producers such as anthrax bacilli have chosen biowarfare, whereby the toxin rather than the pathogen itself attacks the human host. Other microorganisms such as influenza virus have chosen a ‘blitzkrieg’ strategy to overwhelm the host rapidly. At the other end of the spectrum, several pathogens such as Mycobacterium tuberculosis or herpes viruses have chosen trench warfare; this allows for an apparently peaceful coexistence over long periods of time, with the risk of disease activation at a later time point once the host defense line has been weakened. Others are even more malicious. HIV, for example, has chosen guerrilla warfare, undermining host defense by attacking the central regulator of the immune response — the helper T cells. Equally malignant are pathogens such as Trypanosoma cruzi that initiate a civil war in which the immune response attacks our own host cells under the false impression that it is attacking the invaders."

such a sleek analogy.

taken from Kaufmann SHE and Walker BD, Host Pathogen Interactions, (2006), Current Opinion Immunology, 18:371-373.

somehow when i click 'next blog' at the top of people's blogs, and just keep going next next next... i keep seeing blogs parents keep about pregnancy, fertility, little babies, and lots and lots of pictures of little babies..

so distracted. i must go back to smooth muscle relaxing and contracting drugs, diabetic drugs, coagulants and fibrinolytics, and fertility drugs... 1 more day! omggg >_<

i wish the sun stayed out a little longer

oh give me a home

where the buffalo roam

where the deer and the antelope play

where seldom is heard

a discouraging word

and the skies are not cloudy all day

this christmas

is soo very cold.

is a christmas I want to forget.

is the turning point that will change the rest of my life

i know i've eaten a lot...but..

pants used to be worn on the waist. and the sizes used to be 27, 28, 29, 30....nowadays it is worn on the hip.. i'm sure designers know whether the pants they made are to be worn on the waist or on the hip..and the sizes haven't changed. but do the sizes now refer to dimensions of the waist or dimensions of the hip? cos if the same dimensions refer to that of the hip, i doubt anyone fits in the S sizes, and people with asses cant fit into XL sizes. a size 29 from IP zone is loose on my hips and might require a belt, but a size 29 from a pasar malam feels like tights. one is 3+ inches smaller than the other! i shall have to bring soft rulers with me when i go shopping next time..

Spot the Bird!!

Unfortunately I can't provide the answer to this one. u either see it or you don't. but heres a link that could teach you to see it: http://www.netaxs.com/~mhmyers/seeum.html

food galore...

4aug dim sum at Red Star restaurant Chin Swee Road, with lab peoples. good stuff. just unfortunate that they didnt have charsiew cheong fun

7aug karaoke night at NTU alumni at Biopolis. followed by a delicious dinner at 9pm. stingray buffet, yam basket, coffee pork ribs, etc. great food great company

8aug beginning of movie week: Role Models, Slumdog Millionaire, Benjamin Button, Marley and me and Revolutionary Road. we had a good meal at haato too. i liked the curry katsu, the unagi pasta is still as great, my brother loved the mud pie, and the other had a waffle with cookies and cream, but the best ice creams were mine, yuzu sorbet, rock melon and green tea with red bean. we also got the sweet potato one but it wasnt that tasty

9aug national day at grampa's place, pumpkin rice that my mum cooked, and saying the pledge together at the pledge moment, recalling the chinese pledge

10aug discovering PRAWN TOAST yummmm

11aug found out that rum goes well with pepsi and lime

13aug getting reminded of dark times

14aug died trying to weave my way through orchard and squeeze onto a bus home

15aug the epic food trail: kaya toast, ondeh ondeh, goreng pisang, crayfish ipoh hor fun, barley beancurd with ginko, charsiew and prawn cheong fun (they also have mushroom and chicken and scallops O_O), sg day rojak with the perfect mix of sweet sour and spicy, curry puff with extraodinary stuffings like yam, rochor beancurd house, sold out satay, popiah oyster omelette hokkien mee fried kway teow at newton; along the way discovering new (actually old) and cheap places to shop!

dedicated to happy days =)

jun13 Comms parade

met people i didnt expect to meet, died in the heat and enjoyed sitting at the spectators seats in pitch black with his sisters listening to music. probably the last time i looked a least bit slender haha

jun15 or 16.. Seoul garden with sisters!

ate soooo much..and we all came out complaining how we stank of seoul garden. saw iluma and tried some coolio green tea yoghurt or something similar they were giving out in front of iluma.

jun18 cast =_=

got casted after a fall the previous day

jun20 felt so liberated to be at suntec city walking with a cast an umbrella plastic over it and crutches haha..

jun26 cast removed! YES!

jun28 comms ball at St Regis

yay i have one nice picture for good memories of good food, painted mirrors and aching feet. and a very nice uncle who sent me home =)

jul3 monkeying around at holland v with all the sisters! lol

jul4 be the first to see the ndp parade and concert! and the first few to get the funpack! haha i feel so happy that i swapped mine with someone so i got my colour!

jul10 birthday buffet!

Ellenborough Market at Merchant Court Swissotel. CRABBY buffet on a seat facing Clarke quay. pretty pretty place..but i was too busy eating and the camera just did not agree with my crab filled fingers haha i remember someone gulping down oysters like there was no tomorrow (and ended up feeling shitty the next day), i remember a durian mousse which cannot be described for fear that no one will eat it. i remember yam ice cream, and so many other desserts. i remember staying away from risotto. i remember the delicious and huge chili crab which was the best lol

jul11 the only saturday where gerald had excuse from ndp rehearsal

i remember an illegal dinner haha which was meant to be quick cos we wanted to go see the night festival. we took advantage of the free entry to national museum which incidentally i've never stepped in before. and quite cool. old shutters, glass display, love not war cannons, and a rather eerie wayang and movies exhibit. and it poured and poured and we decided the pyrotechnics were too late and probably werent going to happen in this rain, and it took a long time for us both tired people to go home.

jul12 ice age dawn of the dinosaurs with 2 little dinosaurs haha! after which we entertained them at the library, with bubble tea, and eventually at gerald's house. how fun! dinner for gerald's mum's bday at a restaurant at a void deck which didnt have the a la carte buffet that we were hoping it had, but was a good meal nonetheless.

jul13 strudel house!

jul14 the bday no-surprise cake for gerald's mum.

from the place with a name that is difficult to remember. Rive Gauche. Orange cake. pretty cool.

jul16 Thai express dinner and swensens dessert with the girls that i've known for ages.

jul17 food fair at isetan and taka, harry potter and a surprise bday party

jul18 a cloudy day at Sentosa which almost didnt end up at Sentosa. sigh why no sun???

jul19 a nice gathering of 3 people. chatting randomly and enjoying wearing skirts.. plus ice cream at island creamery! =D=D

jul23 sick =S then later migraine. =S

jul29 kuishin bo buffet where i got so stuffed i had to regulate breathing to prevent puking haha.. first time i see marina barrage also. was so sunny and nice! then off to labrador park for fishing! and then dinner with choir girls =)

jul30 the grossest day of animal training.

aug1 first time eating at new york new york and getting a birthday discount although it was supposedly invalid. plus bday present! that big cute bowl-cup. also the day i realised i could borrow from esplanade library and borrow 200 music sheets in 2 books! suddenly feel like i'm productive!

aug2 NAC Exxonmobil Concert in the Park

picnic with sweet sweet peaches, kaya toast and ham sandwiches. plus budak pantai! haha i love the pedra blanca song hehehe =P and the cutest most balloon pooh bear!

if i had to go back tomorrow,

i shall be very very reluctant.

Summer

summer is a good time. it is the excuse for frens to meet up. old frens from no matter how long ago. For if there is no summer holiday and everyone is boringly in singapore all the time, then there will be no special reason to meet up. somehow there must (almost) always be a reason before one can be encouraged to attend a meet up. i wonder how long it'll take for us to get bored of chatting about the past.. maybe never..

有时候逃避是唯一的解决方式

我回来，因为不想再感受在别处的一些沉重
原来家里也沉重

still in hibernation. will be back soon.. another 8 weeks.

holidayyy

yayy
my last 3 days has been so great =D
day before yesterday was christmas eve. was supposed to go carolling for CCF at KKH but turned out the Straits Times anyhow say, cannot want to go and sing then just go. then end up we go there already but were told that cannot join them. so become girls morning out. and very early morning indeed. met up with xiumin and yilun and we went from KKH to Novena and then to Orchard where xiumz and i got yilun famous amos to help her feel better after an awfully screwed up morning. shopped around chatted a bit, we lingered at Topshop for a while to try random clothes, while i got more excited by the extremely tall shoes - stilletto heels plus platformed fronts. hehehe explored the rest of isetan, went to zara walk walk yadayada. Xiumz and I had a good lunch at far east plaza, and wanted to get minute maid limeade but found the price had risen from $1.30 to $2.30 =( time passed quickly and I soon left for home.

lingered, waited, felt like maybe i should have spent the time doing a bit of my essay but i didnt know if i was going to have that much time..in the end i napped away the time until i was called to go downstairs =) got picked up to go geralds place on his way back after booking out, passed gerard his big pack of christmas presents, then to geralds house.

i was amazed by the spread of food. maybe its just because i never had a christmas dinner. turkey stuffed with rice, smoked salmon (omg it was great), ham, sausages, salad, mashed potatoes.. all we lacked was a fireplace. but in singapore so hot if got fireplace we'll all melt in heat. then dessert! really nice pineapple tarts and very good log cake. so christmassy. went over to james place and got so immersed in christmas spirit, with carolling and all. so fun =)
finally headed home to realise i forgot to buy breakfast lol

yesterday morning wake up, wash hair, had a bowl of oatmeals (which was supposed to be filling..) then left to meet up with gerald's family for christmas service. so happening everybody come. like new year like that everyone look beautiful. and i didnt feel out of place wearing my santa claus hat. (lol after coming back from london go out always feel like bringing some head gear..) everyone seem to know everyone, james' brother kept nodding off, vania made nice brownies-in-a-cup, lol and i got hungry in the middle of service hehe..

lunch was at maxwell food centre, i think i passed it so many times but never knew whats it called. and here's when i start ticking off good food that i've intended to have ever since coming back to singapore. we had what we used to call 'michael jackson' back then in the rj canteen - soya bean milk plus grass jelly. gerald got his char kway teow which i stole a bit of, and i got my fishball meepok which i've been ranting about for a while.. somehow i feel like i could get better fishball meepok at toh yi =S but its okay. nowadays good fishballs make me very happy already. we took a walk along one of the roads behind chinatown area, gerald got a really really nice egg tart from this very old stall, and we went looking for this dessert shop that has been featured in quite a few food shows. we finally found it after taking pictures with very cute forever friends bears at chinatown point. 记得吃. somehow despite its simple name i have trouble remembering it. i ordered a 鸳鸯 which has sesame paste and almond cream mixed together, and i added some 汤圆 to it. yay for 芝麻汤圆, and got 2 more 花生汤圆 for gerald. so since i ordered warm dessert, he ordered a cold one, 蛋白马蹄炖西米露 which was coolly nice =) feeling so happily full after having so much food, we walked a bit more to help digestion, and took a bus back to his place.

along the way we stopped at novena square to borrow some dvds to watch, bought breakfast at mama bakery (which according to gerald, has brilliant chocolate bread - i bought and tried, its really nice =) met up with his mum and lil sis originally intending to buy some japanese goodies, but didnt really get anything. had dinner at his house, although it was leftovers from yesterday it was still a delicious meal. [though unfortunately i'm not a fan of pumpkin soup...]

gerald and i then left to meet james and sara and we all headed to cafe del mar. very interesting concept, with daybeds and gabbanas. except those have minimum spending. if dun wanna spend too much, can choose a normal table which will be indoors, or if you want to be in the outdoors on the beach, just grab the benches =) they look like suntanning benches, really suits the beach. the music is kinda weird though (i like their website music more). we had chicken wings, which was really good on its own. and we had nachos which was a generous serving. gerald said i should try a martini so we got a lychee martini, james and sara got margerita, and we also further ordered this thingy that was very cold (lots of ice) and tasted nicely sweet: it had baileys =D it was a cooling night, with very light drizzle so we had to move in from our benches to the tables, but it was a nice stroll along the beach nonetheless.

this morning woke up at 844am, wanting more sleep, so slept a bit more until about 10.. nice cool morning. went to meet gerald and his mum at isetan scotts for the anniversary sale. i didnt know this is a yearly affair until now. spent more than i really should, and took up a lot of time. tried to find the 5 dollars huge can of popcorn at the market in the basement of paragon but i guess it got snatched up. had lunch at this place called 华艺面点小吃, where I had 酸辣汤面， geralds's mum had 榨菜鸡丝面, gerald had 牛肉面, and we also had some sides -小笼包 and 锅贴. good northern china food =) went over the geralds to watch music and lyrics, which was a nice movie. and then went for dinner at serangoon gardens. gerald calls this place one of our national treasures, and while eating here i was also wishing they could come up with a chompchomp clone in london. maybe if they did the rest of the london eateries will have such terrible business they'll close down. lol we ordered a lot of good food!! sambal stingray, satay, sambal potato leaves =D gerald was in the mood for mee goreng as well. there was so much spice we had to get 2 big drinks lol. 1 watermelon juice and 1 grass jelly. and i was sooo full after that. then they had this little corner upstairs of this row of shophouses: nice dessert place called dessert bowl: 一碗甜品, and they had brilliant desserts as well, except i have absolutely no space in my tummy for them and got more engrossed in herworld magazine and mayday concert on dvd as my brain slowly shut down. so ends my happy happy day, i see more to come! =)

Sunset at 330pm

it gets dark so early here..

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cos the river runs
and the river hides
out to the ocean
and under the sky

i promise you
the answer will come
hold on to patience
and watch for the signs
everything in its time

I think i've been too protected for too long.

holidayyy!

yay today is the first day that feels like a holiday, a productive happy day
gerald and i decided to go walk treetop walk cos i've never been there and we started from macritchie entrance (since its near his house and he has trouble waking up ;). it was a 4.4km walk till the treetop walk itself and another long long walk after that. the forest was not too exciting, probably cos i only notice 2 things: the road i'm walking (to protect my ankle) and the rusting on the leaves. there were a number of joggers on that path and many enthu healthy seniors who also came out for a morning walk/jog/briskwalk. made me wonder if i'll have enough energy to come walk this long trail again when i grow old.. there were a buncha macaques in the trees near the Terap Hut and they looked pretty happy playing around making a lot of leaf rustling sounds. i'm happy they have learnt not to pounce on bags expecting to steal food.

when we reached the ranger station we saw a group of ppl and a minister walking out of the ranger station. didnt know what they were there for but didnt look like it was a very official kind of thing that requires a lot of security. somehow we assumed they were going to walk treetop walk and followed behind them for a while, before realising we werent supposed to be walking along a fence that seems to be keeping ppl away from a nuclear missile storage building. turned back to the ranger station, decided to empty our shoes of sand, turned to the right path and walked on. guess who i met! =D hehe truly 不约而同 =D we continued to the treetop walk where we met a family with 3 high kids. the parents decided to let us 4 go ahead first and we had to move in single file on the suspension bridge.

the bridge was pretty short. it was hot and the creatures were mostly hiding in the shade. you could hear some bird calls but they were from quite far away and there were some bugs and butterflies and a few swallow/swifts (those small birds with the cross tail that I see a lot at my forest too) but otherwise nothing much, which was quite sad.. but we were taking pictures anyway to show us being 60m from the ground. we were stopping traffic and the kids behind seem to be getting impatient haha.. after the suspension bridge it was some flights of stairs up and some flights of stairs up until you come to a + junction before reaching back at the ranger's house. it was a wide orange clay path which well-like structures dotted and irregular intervals along the path and that was where we parted ways with our fellow pair. they had come in from venus drive at upp thomson (the shortest way in) and were going back to macritchie. so they walked our path back, while we decided to turn right and walk rifle range trail which ends up at king albert park.

i think rifle range trail is probably one of the nicer trails to walk. u cant find a trail that is SO WIDE it looks like a dried up river and this trail actually has a stream passing through it! ok i exaggerate. its a big drain. but isnt it nice to hear some water on a hot day, water flowing down some slope with the loud gushing sound. we walked past some fences protected by rolled up wires with razor blades. i dun rmb the name even though gerald said so many times. its supposed to be very powerful protection for very powerful buildings. and at the end of the trail we reached a building owned by ST engineering and we thought we had some 3km left to walk. So we walked. and walked. and minivans and trucks passed us but they were going towards ST engine. Then we heard a lorry coming from behind us, we turned to stare at it for a while wondering if we should hitch a ride. But we turned around and continued walking.. the lorry passed us.. and stopped right ahead of us! And the driver offered us a ride out to bukit timah road! Yay! It is so cool to ride on the back of a lorry. It is windy and happy =) and we sped past an ammunition command, BKE, some winding road, the gun club… I think we would have melted in sweat if we really walked all the way out. they dropped us at king albert park where we had an ice cream to cool down, snapped pictures while standing in the middle of the Malaysian railway track, ran across the railway bridge across bukit timah road (ok I ran, because it was more exciting.. if a train is going to come u dun wanna be stuck on the bridge! He didn’t.) (it was damn fun!) and took a bus back to bishan intending to have lunch there. then we saw our companion pair again! While we were in 157 we saw them walking out of macritchie going to cross the road to get to their lunch destination. I think she wanted island creamery and wasn’t willing to consider alternatives and have lunch with us =P haha!

Lunch was at an affordable thai restaurant at Clover Way which is just inside Jalan Pemimpin which is opposite RJ. They had nice green curry and nice tapioca dessert. And I said hi to a teacher. We were supposed to go cycling after lunch. but post lunch syndrome set in and we were both too tired. We fixed half our 1000pc puzzle and felt super accomplished =) then dinner then dance class where I coped nice mocha from dance frens and one of them bought me celery soy milk from mr bean. Which is quite interesting and not too bad and very healthy haha

So ends a happy day..i’m supposed to have more inspiration to mix music but I dun hmph

我总是教自己， 没人陪、一个人，也不能失去安全感
但成功做到后，我会不会变得内向，而开始厌倦人群？

最讨厌 就是听到别人说别人的坏话
最讨厌 就是做事草率，不尽全力
最讨厌 说的话没人听，听了但没记住
是我太挑剔了吗？

曾经的我，做事不求任何人的同意
现在，我只想得到一些肯定

一个礼拜 就这样一天一天过去了
一个月 就这样一个礼拜一个礼拜过去了
一年 就这样一个月一个月过去了
时间流逝的那么快
而我似乎还留在原地

感觉好像让身边的人失望了
可是这次我很清楚，我已尽我所能
之后命运要让我走怎样的路
已不在我能掌控的范围之内
或许最失望的，还是我自己

i saw a white throated kingfisher today!
there it stood perched on my window for that few seconds..
i didnt take a picture of it though, it was so close my movement may make it fly away..

why do we never use DNA fingerprinting to identify your mum?

in the notes its always paternity testing.. i don't remember seeing maternity testing except in my answers. today i figured out why we dun use DNA fingerprinting for maternity testing. cos all kids belonging to this mum will have the same mitochondrial DNA! intracellular organelles are inherited from the mother and the father only contributes the nuclear DNA. so if your mitochondrial DNA is exactly the same as this woman, it probably confirms that she's your mum.. or maybe grandmum. haha

Liberation!

haha! with gp gone half my troubles were gone. with econs gone all my troubles are gone! now theres only one chem and 2 bio left... that should be pretty smooth sailing and alright.. and after that SATs. A level taking so long to finish...
i decided science A level super easy. prelims set so difficult scare us only. but arts A level very difficult. prelim and A level same standard.. so if you dunno what subject to take, just take science. its the safest. the opp cost is that u may find along the way you quite like arts subjects and you don't get to study something you like. BUT whatever it is, you still can get very safe 5A, without that much effort (i think) econs interesting but 读到要死 X_X so thus ends my 2 years of econs education lols
bio! chiong!

Wine appreciation

I'm amused. My dad loves wine. He has his own 9x2 rack for his wines. But he's the only one who drinks wine in the house. and wine is something you can only really enjoy when you have fellow wine drinking mates. unlike how u can go down beer when you're feeling lonely or just feel like destroying yourself. And because he takes quite a wide range of medicine it isn't very good for him to stress his liver out by drinking excessive alcohol. so my mum always asks us to "help him" drink so that he will have less to drink.. my mum herself isn't one who really likes to drink wine either and she'll ask to drink so my dad takes less.. today my dad got a friend to come over so that he'll have someone to drink with. lol someone who's drinking cos he's willing to drink. so for a first time in a long time he isnt drinking almost an entire bottle by himself.. lol

Wonder Kids

I've been made to read the newspapers daily. and i've been conscientious..
yesterday (looking at the time now, 2 days ago would prolly be the more correct term), there was this article, actually 2 articles one in the main section and one in the home section, about this family of wonder kids who have done so many o level subjects aceing every subject, and all of them are "underage" - 12 and 14. and i thought ok these are damn smart people and they really got it in the genes man.. until i read more and felt damn cheated. dunno whether to feel i wish i made a cleverer choice and figured out all my alternatives, or to feel happy that i'm proving myself as a better student.. either way i believe most people will compare themselves with these so called wonder kids if you read the article..
so anyway. the o levels and a levels that they take are not the ones administered by SEAB-Cambridge (the ones that a large bunch of us sit for and slog our brains out for) but by British Council and London Edexcel (that I think usually the international students take..). and if i didnt get my facts wrong, SEAB-Cambridge version is more challenging?.. While the International exams administered at British Council and London Edexcel are less difficult compared to the ones set by SEAB. SEAB-Cambridge means SEAB sets papers while Cambridge marks. I dont know to what extent the 2 papers differ in difficulty though, cos I havent sat down to compare or gone to find out the nitty details about the level of difficulty. but even their parents say that most singapore students should be able to take the other exam and pass with soaring colours. may be taken as humble comment but i think it is quite true too.. so i'm sorta wondering why so many people are being put through the damn difficult SEAB test, and so many people struggle so much to get into JC and with all the through trains its even more difficult for non-train-takers to get into the top jcs, when these struggling people could have a better life taking international exams and going somewhere else for an education, maybe starting university earlier, getting out to work earlier, retiring earlier.. well i guess maybe some people don't have much choice.. especially when going overseas costs a bomb cos of all the travelling and living expenses. so stress your mind out to keep education costs low. the only consolation that i can find is that an A in Singapore 'A' Levels gives you more credits when you go to college/uni than an A in International 'A' Levels. Thats true for maths..8 credits compared to 4 i think. but the other subjects, I think the credits given are the same, most don't make a distinction between Singapore exams and International exams also.
so which is better..I have no idea. when u you have SEAB setting, maybe your students know the scope of testing better and know the marking schemes better and you are perhaps expected to do better. but Cambridge international papers are done by people all over the world so shouldnt they be more flexible in marking? (the way the A levels curriculum is structured, you can ace most subjects by purely memorising key words.., and sometimes it is super frustrating when different key words come up for the same question and at the end of the day, you aren't awarded the marks cos you don't have the key term -.-) and if Singapore sets difficult questions, does Cambridge mark more stringently too?.. maybe one day i will infiltrate the exam boards and figure all these out. I cant figure out rationally who is at the losing end, but I have a feeling students put through the singapore exams are those at the losing end.
and the article comes at a horrible time. at a time like this, with a levels and o levels just a week away, such a reminder that there are alternative easier paths can really make some feel so cheated. and you think of having to compete against these other people with straight As in intl exams that are set more easily.. at a university the disparity in the grades can really make an impression..
oh wells. press on. i'm not worried that i'm not going to make it to university or that i won't be able to do well for a levels.. these a level period is going to pass very quickly and before I know it even prom will be over. so yea keep working hard.. i just happen to be someone who likes to keep looking back to see if I had made the right choices (if i made a choice in the first place) even though I cant change what's done.. lol

Sounds of the Forest

you hear the sound of twigs branches breaking, you can almost hear the heaviness of the entire branch, you hear some tearing of the bark of the tree, and then you hear a loud rustle of leaves. soft landing

I've learnt. that when u feel u're damn lousy at doing sth, it demoralises u more when u put in so much effort, yet still do lousily. and then u haf not the faintest idea how to go about making things better.damn.

I've been weary. not from mugging i think. but a wrong book that landed in my hands at the wrong time. i totally shouldnt be reading storybooks now when i should be mugging. And i dun feel like i've gotten very far with my mugging and its bothering me cos i dun even feel panic coming yet.

this book is beyond painful. there's so much pain hurt and love in between its pages. but the writer is so good she makes me wanna read on. (and in a way i want it to end quickly) i think the emotional roller coaster i get reading it at night is making me tired. and i really don't feel like reading it le. i've gotten tired of the pain, before the narrator has come to a point where she cant take it anymore. and yet i feel that i'm not quite feeling what the narrator feels yet. i skipped to the ending. i think i like the ending - an act of so much courage and conviction.
we are always most deeply hurt by those we deeply love.

another IQ question =)

this is a question justina asked me. quite funky. do without a paper and pen, just ur brains and if u wish, ur fingers. lol
there are 10 people in a room. the first person knows 1 person, 2nd person knows 2 people, 3rd person knows 3...9th person knows 9 people. how many people does that 10th person know? to say that first person knows the second person is to say that the second person knows the first person. its like a handshaking question. if 1 shakes hand with 2 then 2 shakes hand with 1. yeps.
the 10th person knows 5 people =)

eye candy

A toast to chem! =P

iodine in hexane!

BUGSgalore!

the oh so chio butterfly and the huge bee was encountered at ubin =) the other huge bug was encountered on my curtain..someone identify that bug please?...

ubintrip!

we were sitting at the beach waiting for everyone to come. mich and i were there waiting for everyone to come.. since morning.. until lunchtime..

er dun ask me what exactly was I taking.. this picture no focus de lols. we're at the chek jawa house.

i was trying to take the periwinkles but i guess i estimated my distance badly..

from some rock near the house

heres where we walked into the sea

can you spot the school of fish?

that school of fish is swimming parallel to the shore now... sigh my cam is quite lousy..

that lone tree.. that only looks blur on my phone after zooming..

someone said these are fiddler crabs, they have one big pincer and one small one. and they make a lot of holes. the sun was so hot. i'd be underground if i were one of them

the nipah fruit. right in the middle.

the avicennia roots..

we were told to stop to look at this view haha..there were ducks in there.. but the tree right in the foreground here blocked them..

my phone really aint that good. from up here, the quarry waters were cerulean blue. it was damn chio.. which off course u cant quite see in this picture..

encouragement to do better for econs

post Prelims *joy*

Blogging on this laptop is going to be a bit of a challenge, since the internet barely lasts 5 minutes before it disconnects, but i'll try anyway..

post prelims has been beyond joyous.. 有一种被释放的感觉 feels damn great

sister clan outing on friday! planned on thursday, i was so pleased and happy the night before that i wasn't in the mood to mug anymore (and i hope all goes well for chem mcq haha) klunch during lunch time and ratatouille at 2! ended at 4 but chem already felt like damn long ago. my wondrous sisters went kbox wif me even tho i hogged the mic most of the time =p and we still failed to make siok sing in the mic.. (at least i knew she was singing along) and we had so much fun banging our heads to hoobastank's the reason LOL while lincoln pretended he was on the electric guitar in FIR's Lydia. did wu ding with jiahui, where lincoln told him to just scream the top notes lol and justina wondering why cannot hear herself in the mic only to realise she didnt switch on the mic haha =D the whole world went to watch ratatouille yesterday. everybody catching it since prelims finally finish and heng they still showing ratatouille. its a damn cool show.. super cute! sad emily couldnt come. i bet the whole theatre heard my laughter. good lesson to teach people to dare to dream, dare to be different, dare to try new stuffs, and to be yourself. Now if i could just figure out what "myself" is to me.. enjoyable day indeed, i slept till 8, had a very filling dinner..

ubin outing! wah this is the first time my mum and dad allowed me to ubin. i been asking to go ubin since sec 3 after OBS, when jeanette would ask me to go with her. yesterday was the first time i went ubin on a non school organised event and i think it rocked. woke up so early in the morning, must be cos i'm getting used to early mornings haha. michelle and i were the only ones who reached on time.. everyone else was late. so michelle and i sat by the beach and waited as the day passed and the planes flew in. by the time everyone who's supposed to turn up turned up, we were ready for lunch haha cycled to chek jawa, it was low tide when we reached.. about 1+metres. not the lowest tide so not that much to see. we went to this rocky place near the visitor centre where we walked in the shallow water and took nice pictures.. walked the boardwalk, didnt manage to see the sandbank cos the tide wasnt low enough. but we did see some schools of fish. huge schools of fish that we decided were neater than army lol. we saw small fiddler crabs orange and white, those with one huge pincer and one small one. heard birds but didnt really spot any. the weather was too hot for birds to come out. climbed to the top of the viewing tower where i felt truly roasted. there was this tall tree that was quite nice for birds to perch but only a few small birds were there, probably swallows. and below was a mass of nipah palm. almost like a plantation, not for its neatness but cos there was so many of them. the usual lobster crab mounds with no lobster crabs cos its so darn hot. cycled back and met this father who brought his son to chek jawa. they were both on their own bikes and the little one looked kinda tired at having to cycle for so long. haha press on! i hope he had a fun time with those slopes lol. we went back to jelutong campsite for btc, and up a quarry. the quarry water was so blue so pretty =) pity i cant upload pictures cos this laptop is kinda old and doesn't have bluetooth. came home with red cheeks and red nose. never felt so red in a long time. i cant remember the last time i was even mildly sunburnt. suddenly feel healthy. like in the pink of health haha. otherwise usually see myself in the mirror with my usual green face =p haha this is damn fun =))

不能说的秘密

　　冷咖啡离开了杯垫 我忍住的情绪在很后面
　　拼命想挽回的从前 在我脸上依旧清晰可见
　　最美的不是下雨天 是曾与你躲过雨的屋檐
　　回忆的画面 在荡着秋千 梦开始不甜
　　你说把爱渐渐 放下会走更远
　　又何必去改变 已错过的时间
　　妳用妳的指尖 阻止我说再见
　　想象你在身边 在完全失去之前
　　你说把爱渐渐 放下会走更远
　　或许命运的签 只让我们遇见
　　只让我们相恋 这一季的秋天
　　飘落后才发现 这幸福的碎片 要我怎么捡
stuck on this =)

inspired

"Dance is life."-Pierre Dulaine

Will u dance with me?

如今此刻的我的确是有一点疲倦

like how a kid with itchy fingers like to pick at scabs, peel them before its done healing, and let it bleed some more, and then cry out that it hurts.

time to mug

Steve Jobs said

Live everyday like its your last day. Look into the mirror and ask yourself, if today were the last day of your life, will you be doing what you plan to do?

I think this is the wrong time to be thinking about this, but don't think I'm getting uninspired.. just wondering. this week a number of friends tell me how they have so many things they wanna do after A levels, and we just cant wait for this 2 months to go away. Some wanna drive, go overseas, play carefreely.. I can't wait to resume dance (i feel all the fats accumulating and snowballing already!), go teach at Discovery Camps (oh the adorable kids..) again, and finally go on an overseas CIP.. I think honestly if I were to spend today doing what I wanted to do most before I die, it probably won't be sitting at home/in library/in the canteen/in classrooms/on the couch (trying) to mug. Maybe a lot of people have this kind of sentiments now cos they're getting quite tired of mega mugging madness for the last term. Having people around you that draw up study calendars since the beginning of term 4, or half the class missing in tutorials and lectures (and almost no doubt sitting in library mugging) can be quite stressful.. I'm hoping that I can take it slow, for after prelims there's still A levels. Prelims is not the end, theres still that last lap that I don't wanna run out of breath for. From now it'll probably be very focused mugging. am pleased to say I'm ready for it. (still wanna watch mimi..) here's to a month of full time mugging. I think after today I can finally sit down and mug the whole day without thinking what's teachers going through tomorrow.. cheers. and for now, I guess Steve Jobs' advice shall be thrown out the window, and stay down there for a while, until we go retrieve it again after A levels.. We save everything for after A levels..

On a completely random note, last night rained so heavily that I felt the atmosphere was so thoroughly cleansed after that downpour. (and so was I, literally feeling like a chicken in soup when I got home, soaked through and through!) The night sky was cloudless, blacker than I've ever seen, the moon shone so brightly and the stars were shimmering. (Yes I actually saw quite a lot of stars quite clearly). I sat in my living room reading notes while enjoying the cooling winds of the night coming in through my balcony. And then the most horrible thing spoilt the night, smell of cigarette smoke wafting in.. Grr.. Who needs cigarettes on such beautiful refreshing nights like this?!

joyous occasion! =D

i'm finally getting my phone back!!! hurrah!! =D=D

Saturday.

Mega Mugging Madness. I wanted to blog about this yesterday. but had to leave for fireworks by the time I remembered to sign into blogger lol. Our J1s this year quite sweet, don't think councillors in our year were that enthu.. probably would have shot down the idea immediately. so really kudos to the j1s who thought of this idea, who defended it and those who saw in through. it was, in my opinion, really rather mad. mad thing number 1: they have free dinner buying service for us while we stay in school to mug. first there are so many people mugging in school! how many trips and how many people would they need.. second: there was this buncha ppl in my classroom who asked for KFC dunno what meal, change mash potato to cheese fries, change drink to mountain dew. and everyone came up with their own meal wif their own preferences. i thought, 'wah imagine everyone who went down to order had their own preferences..' o.O i think the j1s really deserve applause for their courage to do this. dunno whether its only for this week.. mad thing number 2: they had individually packed study packs for every J2, personalised pencils with names written with marker and with alphabet macaroni. imagine all the tedious work they put in to do this for every J2. dun matter even if they spell my name wrongly. lol. then there were sweets and coffee mix. they must have quite a big budget this year.. but then ah.. i think although mad thing number 1 was probably well received and greatly appreciated, i dun think mad thing number 2 made people very touched or anything. Even though we know it probably require a lot of effort, not many J2s felt they really appreciated the J1s packing this, or felt very spurred on to mug harder cos of their encouragement.. actually first thing that came to my mind was, wah this year they got so much time to pack these.. dun need to mug promos ah.. lol but anyway, great job 27ths.

Fireworks. so cool la.. i always watch fireworks from padang, esplanade, anywhere else except at the exact location where its supposed to be. this year go to the marina bay floating platform lei.. and the fireworks was coordinated with the music so zhuang4 guan1. usually fireworks just on its own no music or anything.. and the fireworks shot from the platform as well as the floating barges on the bay itself. i always thought fireworks must come from land cos someone need to stand there to light it haha =p i like the one that came up with a silver/white tail and exploded in purple lights. purple + silver = damn pretty =D and i like the red ones that after exploding for a while they turn into golden sizzles haha. lol i love the terms that i use. =p really ren shan ren hai, shui xie bu tong, so many people lorh.. haha but quite cool. went home real late. heng i caught my last bus back. there was this mum with the kid in my bus's queue and the poor little kid was tired and whining.. mum had to keep the kid awake.. telling him you're heavier when u're sleeping..

today. salmon salmon salmon. the taste of it is still in my mouth. omg. of all the great fish i took today only the taste of salmon still stays in my mouth lol.. went sushi tei. they are really quite zai lorh. super fresh. the salmon qq de. it was cooked, not raw de. my family ordered quite a spread. if only i had my camera phone i would take nice pictures.. my brother got the barbequed eel with sushi rice plus side dish fried baby ebi (prawn). my mum got her tempura udon that she says she cant resist not ordering it, taking something else more special instead. i got a seafood paper hot wok. cant remember its exact name. chose miso soup base. and in it was silken tofu, mushrooms, lotsa vege and carrots, large scallops, crab, prawn (omg their prawn was so crunchy and so fresh that the whole thing just came out of the shell so easily and it was sweet.. I don't ever remember having nicer prawns than this) and of course salmon. comes with some beehoon like thing inside also but I didn't know at first, so i got myself cold cha (greentea) soba. I love soba =) nicer than ramen and udon. my brother had a mixed seafood bowl that comes with rice. includes salmon roe, fresh tuna salmon crab sashimi and the japanese egg (not the chawanmushi). my dad got a ramen and a set of otoro sashimi. otoro is apparently the tuna's belly and is the best sashimi, nicest part of the tuna, nicest fish. lol on top of it all, we had more sashimi, salmon otoro and yellowtail, as well as sushi, where i took the octopus one, my mum took the squid and the double baby prawn one, my brother took the salmon, other brother took the salmon roe and the tuna, think there was 2 more but i dun remember which they are. omg delicious. lol dun wanna know how much this all amounted to...

dad in super good mood today lorh.. go vivocity buy so many things. bought my brother new adidas shoes, he always gets branded new shoes, and i havent even worn branded shoes before =/ well and my other brother got 2 pairs of levi jeans O.O congratulate him for his first 2 pairs of jeans lol. no one would believe he doesn't have his own jeans.. I may have many pairs of jeans but they all come from my aunt. i don't complain. haha my figure very difficult to get good jeans that fit well. my aunt's figure's more or less like mine so she pick all the fitting ones for me le. =p my mum spotted a nice jacket in G2000 that she thinks will fit her dress very nicely. $99. but G2000 closed by the time we went back, she tells me we're supposed to come back tomorrow to get it. I told her don't worry, its new arrival, won't run out of stock so quickly. she said, what if no more sizes? lol i'm amused. my mum's also eyeing a nice bag that i picked for her. she can't wait to get rid of her current bag. haha my dad picked it and bought it and at that time, my mum's first response was, why u buy this kind of ah ma bag for me.. LOL the bag i picked was of course much nicer ;) but she was having 2nd thoughts cos it was a little too expensive for her. and then there was promotion for spanish wines (i think its damn cool for vivocity to have a corner for spanish stuff.o.O) I think my dad got 2 Cava and a Sangria (which apparently means the Holy Grail. my family tried it when they went spain last year end, theirs was mixed on the spot and it was called Sangrael). I'm not particularly enthusiastic when it comes to wine tasting cos i don't really like the bitter aftertaste. all alcohols have bitter aftertaste =/ but i think this one's quite different. actually tastes quite nice =) haha so everyone yi ren2 yi dai4 when we went home.. tomorrow my mum's dai4 will be on its way back haha. went to look at gowns but not really in the mood to buy anything yet. havent seen something that i really like.. so man man lai la still got a lot of time. i should be mugging and doing my portfolio and personal statement now anyways.

raindom..

just a little bored..and wanted to scribble stuff here..
hehe got my first A for essay! tian..probably my one and only. but nevermind quite pleased with myself anyway..
ruthie called to say she cried reading my peer evaluation for her.. lol i just felt i had to publicise this =p
i sang a beautiful song today! (oh but no its not uploaded on my soundclick cos the song is nice but i din sing it that nicely haha..)
i slept a grand total of 3 hours in the afternoon today! ..which i dun think is very little, but i felt rejuvenated so thats good. and i sorted out my worksheets today.. and of all the documents/notes/worksheets we received for this term, GP takes a grand total of 50%! much much GP to practice and read with. GP ah GP....

What if Singapore were a person?..

Part 1


Part 2


Part 3 and my favourite HAHA! <3


Happy national day! =D

*
i wanna go listen to budak this friday evening.. anyone interested?..

me =)

dunno why so into personality tests lately haha saw this on gerald and james blog i thot look quite pretty so i went to do also =P i must be in a state of change, used to be ENFP, then did a test that told me i was ESTJ, now ENTP i wonder how much more drastically will i change lol..

quite sad though, teaching or doctor are not on my list of compatible jobs o.O

流泪手心 - 王力宏

云飘在天空
浪在海流动
这世界太多无法掌握的梦
你站在风中
你是自由的
生命有太多不得不分的痛
当你将离别握在我手心
我听见爱被悄悄捏碎的声音
你不懂你不要的我的心
会随你松开的手而喊停
我试着微笑
试着拥抱
在每一秒
我不想看见闭上的眼睛
害怕你最后
化成泪流出手心
你给过的承诺
我怎能不放手
当你诚实诉说
他的爱多辽阔
这是我的手
它牵过你往事中度过
这段漫长的路不该走到寂寞

天啊，好旧的歌，但总是最好听

we are really quite dependent on technology eh? especially our handphones. honestly if you lost your handphone, together with all your personalised profiles, photos and music in your memory card, contacts in your directory, 900+ messages from friends teachers and all people dear.., you'll probably feel like a part of your soul got deleted.. the phone virtually records your life in pictures words music.. really sudden realisation, cos today my phone got taken for repair. and i smartly forgot to transfer all my contacts into my sim card. and i know i cannot copy all my messages into my memory card either. so haii. was quite distraught for a while.. i shall not forgot my contacts in my directory ever again.. meanwhile i'll have to find someway to recover all my contacts numbers.. sigh

and today. my nose pwned me.
ie i should sleep now.